Dear So and So

[Owlie]

Thanks, everyone. I needed some new head shots because I'm overhauling my website and job hunting. DH bought me a great camera a while back and we've been adding to our equipment with the intention of taking it to the professional level. I'm almost there - studying hard and working on my portfolio.

I think he did a pretty good job.

Roxy

You look great, Roxy!

Dear Neck and Shoulder Muscles:
I cannot control what Immune System is doing. So I'm sorry if you were damaged by an pollen-induced sneezing fit on the bike yesterday. However, we have things to do tomorrow (like ensuring you don't hurt while riding the rest of the time), so I'd appreciate it if you'd stop swelling and leave Nerve alone. Nerve would also appreciate it.

[VeganBikeChick]

Dear Self,

Do not send out any more cover letters while sleep-deprived. Now 3 different hospitals know that you were applying to one specific hospital and I'm sure that won't put you at the top of their new hires list

Signed,

Get Some Rest

[alexis_the_tiny]

Whoa, Roxy, love the new avatar! It's gorgeous.

Congrats Trek and Knotted. Good luck with everything.

Dear weather,

give it a break already. The heat is nice but needing three showers a day and having the sweat start even before I step out of the shower might border on ridiculous. That sort of weather is for June. You have another three months to go. Now go back to sleep.

Dear brain,

quit reading the leaflet on the steroid eye drops that say you'll get glaucoma and go blind if you keep using it. Its a sad reality of our life. It's either potential glaucoma or I claw my eyes blind from the itch of conjunctivitis that no anti-histamine eyedrops can give relief to. Pick one.

[malkin]

All the best to Trek and Knot...


Hmmm...Pac Bell...collections...*embarrassed*...I wonder I ever had the benefit of your professional services way back when I was a Bay Area undergrad delinquent Pac Bell customer....but maybe it was only PG&E...

[Trek420]

All the best to Trek and Knot...


Hmmm...Pac Bell...collections...*embarrassed*...I wonder I ever had the benefit of your professional services way back when I was a Bay Area undergrad delinquent Pac Bell customer....but maybe it was only PG&E...

I was only in collections department for 6 months but if you'd talked to me I was about as friendly a rep as they go . I transfered to another department called D&A, then called PBAR, then called STAR, then called a half dozen or so department name changes after that but was a great job, that office moved, moved again, and again ... then our jobs went to Missouri we all went to a different departments ...

[Sky King]

Dear wholesale supplier,
Why when we are really starting to see some recognition with the product have you decided to change the design? WTF and why did you not anticipate spring ordering. It is a bike product for heaven's sake. Having invested thousands of dollars in growing the biz for you in the usa I am not a happy camper.

[withm]

Dear Delivery Person:

It's 4:30 on a beautiful sunny, 70oF Friday afternoon. For a change there is no wind.

And I'm stuck in the office for another HOUR waiting for you???? Please get un-lost and get your stuff over here so I can lock up and go ride my bike!

[ultraviolet]

Dear graphic designer,

You don't have to illustrate a company's entire business model in a single logo. For reference, please see...well, any of a number of logos for brands you know and love. You went to school for this, so I'm sure you have, or have seen resources you can reference. And even if you don't have resources, you can go outside and look at the signs and billboards all over the city we're working in.

When I said, "Wow, there's a lot going on there. Let's look for some ways to simplify and abstract some of those concepts," it wasn't meant to signal that it was time for you to describe the company's business model to me again. That meant it was time for you to go away and utilize the skills I assume you were hired for...namely, visually communicating concepts in clear and compelling ways. If all the client wanted was a literal graphic representation of their business model, anyone with Powerpoint and a reasonable clip art library could have done that.

Thanks,
Your new team lead (who, by the way, isn't very patient)

[Eden]

To whom it may concern:

I now know more about lard than I *ever* thought I would....

(anyone need a mason jar full.... I made more than I needed)

-the making empanada machine

[emily_in_nc]

To whom it may concern:

I now know more about lard than I *ever* thought I would....

(anyone need a mason jar full.... I made more than I needed)

-the making empanada machine

Make some suet for the birds! That's what we used to buy it for...

[Eden]

Oh dear.... I don't think I could waste it on the birdies.... I rendered it myself from local organic leaf lard.... too much work just to feed the birdies.

[Owlie]

To whom it may concern:

I now know more about lard than I *ever* thought I would....

(anyone need a mason jar full.... I made more than I needed)

-the making empanada machine

Empanadas? Can I come over?

Pie crusts? I know a number of people who insist that lard makes the best ones... Other pastry?

[Pax]

Dear Rick,

The lady that blindly turned left in front of you the other day didn't know that you were riding your motorcycle to see your gravely ill sister, she couldn't be bothered to look around before she turned her 6000lb. SUV right in front of you, she was busy, or distracted, or disinterested.

She killed you because whatever she was doing was more important. Your beloved wife of 31 years, your three kids, all the hundreds of friends you've made over the years, we'll all miss you terribly.

And to think, all she had to do was look where she was going.

Signed,

Your lost friend

[alexis_the_tiny]

To whom it may concern:

I now know more about lard than I *ever* thought I would....

(anyone need a mason jar full.... I made more than I needed)

-the making empanada machine

That sounds delicious. Make some pie crusts?

Pax, I'm so sorry about your friend.

Dear friend, today marks the 2nd year of the day some idiot drunk put an end to all your adventures in this world. Wherever you are, I hope you know how much of an inspiration you have always been and still are.

[indysteel]

(((Pax))). I'm so sorry you lost a friend. Hugs to you. Hang in there; I know this has been a rough spell for you.