Our very own humiliation/embarassment thread

[Robin]

As a freshman I joined the bike club to meet people and stay active. Unfortunately for me I didn't know the area and when they took us on the first long ride I peddled my a$$ off to keep up with the more experienced riders (I really didn't want to get lost out in the country). Well, we go down around the reservour, and then a couple miles into it we start up this monster hill. I can't ride any more so I put my foot down to walk the rest of the hill and I have no feeling in my legs and collapse right there Not embarrassing enough, a couple days later I'm eating lunch and hear someone from the bike club call out "HEY CRASH!" yup, that's me the only reason I lived it down is that soon after some "experienced" riders got lost and ended up in another state!!!

[Lise]

I would say the time my skinny tire (1978) caught a groove on a dirt path and I face planted...or the time I rode my bike to school when it was still too cold, hit a patch of ice, flipped sideways onto the street, and ripped up my pantyhose (1977)--I was riding in a SKIRT? Don't remember that, but I do remember ripped pantyhose and road rash. I would say those times, but those were just accidents.

The most humbling thing that happens these days is getting the back crotch of my bike shorts caught on the nose of my saddle when I'm trying to get back on the bike as the light turns green. Sheesh.

[bikerHen]

Why Why why do/did parents make their kids eat liver? c

I love liver. Sauteed with onions! Yum! Even liked it as a kid. BikerHen

[Crankin]

I've had a few embarrassing momements. I think the worst was last July when I went on my first group mtb ride. It was described as a "meander." It was 98 degrees out and half the people had bikes that looked like they were falling apart and they had jeans on. The ride was in a place that I cross country ski in, so I thought it would be OK. Let me tell you, I walked most of it and spent the rest of the time screaming, sweating, and swearing. I was last. The sweep was getting pissed at me. Then, at the end, when we went out on the road to get back to our cars, I thought I would faint trying to ride that mb up a big hill on the road with those little cranks. I didn't get back on my mb until last Sunday.

Then there was the time I crashed going down a 20% grade on my first tour in vermont. It was a little wet out and I was freaked out by the descent. I was screaming, "MY brakes failed," and my husband was yelling at me to just let go of the brakes... I decided to go down instead. I was lying in the road, still clipped in when some people down the road at a historic covered bridge were yelling, "Are you OK?" I was so embarrassed, I got right up and rode off and finished the ride. But the next day i was so sore and bruised, I couldn't do the big climb.
I only fell once from forgetting to unclip, in the middle of a busy intersection with cars all around me. That never happened again. But I have an intense dislike of stops where you come to a little rise and it's hard to start up again. No matter what gear I use, I always get nervous and sometimes drag myself across the road with the foot that's not clipped in. That's embarrassing!

[DirtDiva]

I love liver. Sauteed with onions! Yum! Even liked it as a kid. BikerHen

Mmmm mmmm. Lambs' fry and bacon. Never saw how eating liver and kidneys and what-have-you was any worse/different than eating meat. Soggy cereal, on the other hand...

[Geonz]

I've gone out to a group ride, gotten the bike out of the car in a pre-caffeine muddle, and put the back wheel on backwards (that's right, chain not lined up with derailleur). Funny thing, moving the pedals didn't move the bike! The group was just pulling off... but they stopped and waited while I fixed it...

... and I'm still working on that fear of not being strong enough to get the bike going, and scootering across a whole intersection... but it's getting bette.r

[bentforlife]

but on a greenbroke horse as a teenager(eons ago) We're weaving through the rows of pecan trees when she decides she's tired of being ridden. She takes me right at a branch that's about chest level. We were cantering pretty fast, so the only choice I have is to grab the branch and hang on.

I looked pretty funny hanging about 4.5 feet from the ground in this pecan tree. My sisters finally turned their horses around to help me down AFTER they were through laughing!!

She actually turned out to be one of the best riding horses we owned, after she bucked me off bareback, scraped me off on the side of the barn and rabbit hopped me a couple of times also. I miss having a horse at times, but my knees don't Have to really enjoy my bike now. At least I'm in control(most of the time).

Donna

[DrBee]

My most embarrassing moment was in October, when I was chased by that big scary dog. I kept riding away from where the dog was. I rode 10 miles until I ran out of road - it turned into big chunky white gravel. Now, I was thinking to myself - how am I going to get home??? I didn't have the phone with me (duh) and was in the middle of nowhere. I just couldn't go back towards that dog - I knew he and his buddy would be waiting for me. Well - my only choice was to ask for help. I went up to a farmer (a young gentleman) and asked him to throw me and my bike in the back of his truck and drive me past that dog. As my husband put it, "how could a guy turn down a woman in cycling clothes". The farmer didn't laugh too mcuh and even put my bike in the back of his truck and let me ride in the front. He grinned the entire way back. I felt so inept. BUT - the dog was waiting for me, so it was a good move.

[crazycanuck]

A week before moving to Australia Ian(da man...) and I went out to Woodhill (mtn bike park) near Auckland to have a quiet day in the forest-(normally the place is packed on weekends but we went on a wed)

After about 2hrs of riding i was a bit tired and came over some small sandy hill & the next thing i know i was over my handlebars..not before i hit the bit above my privates on the head of my bicycle on the way down...I was alone and was in pain for a bit there. I couldn't walk for 5 min or so...(Had i been a guy.. ) and couldn't bend well for the next few days.

Then today whilst out i went to go around a corner with a bit of pea gravel i was fine going into the corner but didn't notice a blackboy bush on my right side..next thing i knew i heard a whomp & landed on my left side..My biking partner & I had a good giggle & tried to set off but noticed my back wheel's quick release became loose....

c

[Polly]

My mate Debs and I were cycling very slowly around a forest trail in a place called Thetford in England - possibly the flattest, least technical mtb centre you could imagine... when I have to cycle through a mudddy puddle, and I fall in. Typical.

the following explanation I initially wrote to amuse my friends, who are always keen to hear of my latest disaster, perhaps a little too keen! I decided to tell it as it should have been... not sure how the humour might translate... but here goes! (oh I should point out the 'beast' is a section of singletrack with a few bumps in it!)

"…Racing along the fire road Polly looks around; there’s no one to be seen, she’s alone, just her and the sun bleached stumps which broken and abandoned scatter the barren landscape. She turns again, catching a glimpse as she does of her sidekick; Die-hard Debs. She is relieved but not surprised that Debs too has made it past the snarling beast…

Far from relaxing, Polly doesn’t let her concentration waver, her toned body suddenly tenses, her perfectly manicured fingers hover over her brake levers… the landscape has changed. No longer is the sky visible above her head, she has been plunged into darkness – a strange unearthly twilight, silent and menacing. Struggling to decipher the curves of the route ahead, Polly carefully picks her way through the dense undergrowth of the tree strewn singletrack, twisting, turning, all the time anxious not to scrub off too much speed… but it is then that she sees it. Ahead; its outline barely visible in the murky distance… The puddle of Gloom!

All too soon the puddle is upon her, a vast expanse of sticky gloop… its depth unfathomable, its effects potentially devastating. As she approaches this brown oozing mass, she can see the surface begin to tremble… Polly can only wonder what lies beneath. Which line should she take? Left? Right? Left…the decision irrelevant, Polly’s fate is sealed.

As our heroine races past the edge of the danger, a long slimy tentacle springs out and winds itself around her rear hub. One sharp tug and the back wheel of Polly’s bike is dragged into the mire, the Chris King hubs screaming with anger. Polly bravely tries to throw herself from her steed, to avoid a muddy fate worse than death. As she crashes to the ground she is aware of her bike spinning round above her, pivoting on her foot. Only her incredible strength saves her and her bike from being sucked under the surface of this terrible quicksand…

As Polly lies at the edge of the menace, clinging stoically to her bike with only one cleat, Die-hard Debs appears… her razor sharp senses immediately assessing the situation. She walks carefully around the Puddle of Gloom, her eyes transfixed. Eventually she speaks …

“Blinkin' 'eck Poll…. What on earth have you done this time? And… how the blazes have you managed to be still clipped into your bike but it facing the other way round?…”


It was very embarrassing, I was covered in mud and unable to move until Debs rescued me, in fact I lay there going "no, no, I'm fine really" as several small children and pensioners cleared the puddle, and offered to help... doh!

[DirtDiva]

A wonderful tale of woe! I think surfing through acres of mud is about the only technical skill I possess.

[Nokomis]

On a ride with the boys, my first season on the road and we've covered 25 miles or so. We stop to take a quick break in farm country at our favorite U shaped driveway. We pull in the far side, coast back to the near side to easily get back on the road. So I am the last one in - coasting, feeling pretty darn cool that I'm able to coast one foot like - slowing, slowing, slowing, Tipping! and slowing! damn! Can't get my foot out, so I fall - so close that I'm afraid I'm going to set off a domino effect catastrophe. Manage not to hit anyone else, but end up on my back, still clipped in, with the bike completely upside down, in the air, and my water bottle starts to drip on me.



Still haven't lived that one down.

[pnkciocc]

I've been lurking but this is so great I have to add my own!!!!

I was about 12 miles into a 30 mile ride on my new bike with the BF on Sunday - we had just stopped and added ice & water to the water bottles so the wb was starting to sweat. We were on a short stretch between stoplights so I reached for a drink - went to put the wb back and dropped it. BF was in front of me so I yelled for him to wait - I unclipped, stopped - caught my shorts on my seat (what is it with this???) - tipped sideways (somehow managing not to fall completley over) just as 2 young guys in a mercedes rolled past. The mercedes guys then pull up to the stoplight and tell the BF I'd dropped my water - I hope they didn't tell him I almost busted.

I'm so glad I didn't completely crash

My other embarrasing moment happened when I was riding years ago - I was riding with a small group of guys downtown on a weekend. We rounded a corner and slowed for traffic. A very large Cadillac pulled up beside us (very very close) - freaked me out and to keep my balance I hit the car with my left hand from front to back as it slowed up beside me... I ran into one of the guys at a race last year and he re-told the story (laughing the entire time) to my BF... I can't believe he remembered after 18 years.

I'm sure there are other stories but I'm choosing not to remember...

[pnkciocc]

end up on my back, still clipped in, with the bike completely upside down, in the air, and my water bottle starts to drip on me.

Don't feel bad... BF did that on our first group ride this year - there were probably 50 people that saw him upside down before he could get unclipped and upright...

[BadgerGirl]

OMG, these stories are really funny. Mine isn't as great, but involves clipless pedals, of course... I was riding home from work at about 2am, enjoying no traffic and the cool air. I came to a major intersection, and saw one lone car in the distance. Instead of busting the light, I thought I would do the right thing and wait for the car and use the pedestrian signal. As i headed to the curb to hit the signal, I kind of forgot to clip out. Didn't even remember. Must have been tired. Anyways, as I was falling to my right, it dawns on me, but it was too late. I just fell over. So I am now laying on my right side, which is the side I normally clip out of, and I can't get my foot out. I am laying there like an upside down turtle...helpless. After a little concentration, I clip out my left foot and quickly scramble upright before someone sees me! Thank goodness it was two in the morning!