Issues making friends?

[badger]

I think your issue isn't unique but rather prevalent as we get older. People do get pretty comfortable with the group they have and don't often venture out to make new friends.

I've tried to increase my circle of friends in the past year by joining a female-only snowboard camp which yielded one person I kept in touch with later. She invited me to join her book club and that opened doors to more people with similar interests. However, it's still difficult to have anything more than meeting them every 2-3 months to talk about books. Most of them are friends of friends so they know most everyone there so they'll talk of things or people I don't know. The original contact I made at the camp moved away to England and I've not heard from her since. It's REALLY hard to make good, lasting friendships.

So, like everyone else here, I know how you feel!!

[ehirsch83]

Thanks everyone! It really is a common issue,but not one I have had to deal with as much till now (I have never worked somewhere with me being the sole employee -which I feel just makes me feel more segregated) .
I am going to look for a book club and make sure to continue to pursue new friendships. Also make sure I keep in good touch with those I don't live near anymore.

[macski]

Thanks everyone! It really is a common issue,but not one I have had to deal with as much till now (I have never worked somewhere with me being the sole employee -which I feel just makes me feel more segregated) .
I am going to look for a book club and make sure to continue to pursue new friendships. Also make sure I keep in good touch with those I don't live near anymore.

And don't be afraid to make it clear to someone you've met who you like and feel a connection with that you'd like to do something with them. A bit like GLC1968 and indysteel's examples earlier. It may feel weird and I have to confess that I'm not very good at it myself.

But several years ago someone I worked with did that to me. My husband at the time was away frequently for work and one time when he was going to be away this person at work, let's call her Kath, said to me 'If your husband is going to be away why don't I come over and we can have a girls night in?' She did and we've been friends ever since.

But I'm too shy to do that myself Or, more accurately, I have a strong fear of rejection - perhaps because when I was a child (an only child) I was slow to pick up the rules about making friends and perhaps was a bit of a try-hard with a few hard lessons from other kids.