Well I might be joining the peri club!

[pll]

I will echo what owl said -- be open minded.

I will also second the idea of talk therapy. It is a hard thing to do, but you reap the rewards in the long run. Some years ago, I needed to get through a rough spot. A friend (a pediatric psychiatrist) recommended a psychiatrist that was very good: she did talk therapy and was into all kinds of alternative therapies. I am the nightmare customer for doctors because I am not a believer in pills (or herbs), so we tried a number of alternatives between pills and types of therapy. For me, cognitive behavioral / talk therapy worked best. <life would be easier if I could enjoy some placebo effect.>

My point is that you can find a well qualified therapist. In my case, I found the perfect "bundle" of therapy and competence writing prescriptions. Having the same person do both was great as we started every meeting with an assessment of how the medications were working. I also worked with her in discontinuing them gradually,

Indeed, we know very little about brain chemistry and there is a lot of trial and error, but at least one part of medicine has a measure of scientific testing.

[OakLeaf]

Well it *has* been a long holiday, hasn't it.

I too am sick. I am sick of doctors taking advantage of a gullible old woman and a delirious old man to torture my father to death. He deserves very little, but he deserves a better death than he is getting from them. Any human being does.

I am sick of the practice of medicine bearing more resemblance to "The Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly" than to anything any rational person would voluntarily choose.

And I am sick of "religions" of all kinds (doctrines that theirs is the One True Belief System) that would rather destroy a thing than learn about it.

[goldfinch]

Well it *has* been a long holiday, hasn't it.

I too am sick. I am sick of doctors taking advantage of a gullible old woman and a delirious old man to torture my father to death. He deserves very little, but he deserves a better death than he is getting from them. Any human being does.

I am sick of the practice of medicine bearing more resemblance to "The Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly" than to anything any rational person would voluntarily choose.

And I am sick of "religions" of all kinds (doctrines that theirs is the One True Belief System) that would rather destroy a thing than learn about it.

I am very sorry about your father.

Believe me, I have educated myself on acupuncture and several other altmed practices. I never, but never, simply want to destroy something rather than learn about it. Never. I just a lot of questions and follow the evidence.

[beccaB]

Well it *has* been a long holiday, hasn't it.

I too am sick. I am sick of doctors taking advantage of a gullible old woman and a delirious old man to torture my father to death. He deserves very little, but he deserves a better death than he is getting from them. Any human being does.

I am sick of the practice of medicine bearing more resemblance to "The Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly" than to anything any rational person would voluntarily choose.

And I am sick of "religions" of all kinds (doctrines that theirs is the One True Belief System) that would rather destroy a thing than learn about it.

I'm with you on that one. My relationship with my savior is personal to me and I chose to worship in the way I see fit. After all, my savior was able to reach me in the way that was right for me. I am from a diverse mix of religions. Some Jewish and even possible some Mennonite way back. Of all people I completely respect diversity and personal choice.

[beccaB]

Oh, and I haven't had a period in 5 months. After a lifetime of every 28 days almost to the HOUR, amazingly, the last 2 years were very weird and irregular with cramps coming back into the picture. I hope the period is gone for good. I'm 50, and I'm not sorry to not be having them anymore. (hopefully!) I have had a few mild hot flashes, and have dealt with anxiety in the past and have the tools to deal with it now. I went through a pretty bad experience this past spring that lasted until the fall, and I came out on top of that one. I think I'm liking this 50 thing, except for the arthritis part, which may be related more to structure than age.

[Brandi]

Well it *has* been a long holiday, hasn't it.

I too am sick. I am sick of doctors taking advantage of a gullible old woman and a delirious old man to torture my father to death. He deserves very little, but he deserves a better death than he is getting from them. Any human being does.

I am sick of the practice of medicine bearing more resemblance to "The Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly" than to anything any rational person would voluntarily choose.

And I am sick of "religions" of all kinds (doctrines that theirs is the One True Belief System) that would rather destroy a thing than learn about it.

I here you! And I am sorry i didn't respond earlier. They are torturing my mother in law as well. She is on I think 9 different drugs at 3 times a day! And she has no idea what any of them do! She says to keep her alive but at the same time they seem to be making her forget who she is. @ 83 and still living on her own I worry that all these meditcations are stealing what is left of her. That may seem harsh to some but seriously all these meds and she hasn't a clue what they are for? Granted my sister in law is watching out for her but after loosing her daughter a few years ago to Huntington's at age 21 she is kinda done and is just maintaining my mother in law. Even she doesn't know what they are all for. Sad.

[Crankin]

That is not right, Brandi. I know you are not there to help in this situation, but if a doctor doesn't clearly explain what each medications for, then the patient, or someone needs to advocate for her. It is not safe for someone not to know what medications are for; your s-i-l or another responsible adult needs to go to a doctor's appt. with your m-i-l and write down the information. If this isn't possible, they can go to Elder Services in their town, county, or state and have a case worker help with this.

[Brandi]

That is not right, Brandi. I know you are not there to help in this situation, but if a doctor doesn't clearly explain what each medications for, then the patient, or someone needs to advocate for her. It is not safe for someone not to know what medications are for; your s-i-l or another responsible adult needs to go to a doctor's appt. with your m-i-l and write down the information. If this isn't possible, they can go to Elder Services in their town, county, or state and have a case worker help with this.

I know and we have tried to be active in this but my husband had a strange falling out with his sister when his mom first started having issues last year. He offered to take over for his sister (who has power of attorney) and she flipped out on him. And then hung up when he said she was being irrational (big mistake). She claims all is under control when I talk to her.
I don't know. We have gone and stayed with her and she has such an awful time remembering things. I think the drugs don't help. She refuses to go live in a home. Has always said she does not want that. Her sister lived in one for years and her mind went so I think she is really scared of that.
It is tough when you have brother's or sister's have different idea's of how to do things.
And I am just the wife you know I can only say so much.

[PamNY]

That sounds tough, Brandi. Good luck.

Could your husband talk to the pharmacist, at least? Sometimes they are very helpful.

[Brandi]

We are pretty far from her. About a 5 hour drive. And his sister is so not wanting us to butt in. I hate that this has happend. I thought we were a better family then this. Sigh.