Thread Drift

[indysteel]

Um. Anyone else receive, uh, surprising PM's recently?

None here. Did one of the spammers pm you?

[Fredwina]

Finally, got Mother moved to Memphis and away from my brother and his kin, who looked at her as their personal salvation army. Now, comes the fun stuff - managing her finances long distance (unless I get lucky and find a job down there) good thing my furniture is rented. fun, fun, fun!!

[indysteel]

DH and I were just invited to a Christmas party that is explicitly for the yound child of a friend of his. The child in question is one and a half--not that it matters. Huh? I thought Christmas, in and of itself, was sufficiently "for the kids." Do we now need separate Christmas parties for them, too? I'm so confused.

DH's friend is someone he's known since grade school. He's married to a woman who often refers to herself and her young daughter as "princesses." They live elsewhere, so most of what I know about them, I know through Facebook and the intimate details (often in pictures) that they provide of their princess-like lives. From what I can gather, the world orbits around this child and the mother. So, while I'm not shocked that they are throwing a Christmas party for the child, I do find it a little (or a lot) obnoxious. But, again, maybe I'm just enough out of the loop on parenting as a childless person. If I am, I hope someone will enlighten me. Is this a new trend?

In case it wasn't clear from my snark, we're not going to the party. We've now sent two gifts to this couple for the child (baby shower and post-birth); neither one of which was ever acknowledged, not even in passing. So, the little princess will not receive anything further from us.

[tealtreak]

DH and I were just invited to a Christmas party that is explicitly for the yound child of a friend of his. The child in question is one and a half--not that it matters. Huh? I thought Christmas, in and of itself, was sufficiently "for the kids." Do we now need separate Christmas parties for them, too? I'm so confused.

DH's friend is someone he's known since grade school. He's married to a woman who often refers to herself and her young daughter as "princesses." They live elsewhere, so most of what I know about them, I know through Facebook and the intimate details (often in pictures) that they provide of their princess-like lives. From what I can gather, the world orbits around this child and the mother. So, while I'm not shocked that they are throwing a Christmas party for the child, I do find it a little (or a lot) obnoxious. But, again, maybe I'm just enough out of the loop on parenting as a childless person. If I am, I hope someone will enlighten me. Is this a new trend?

In case it wasn't clear from my snark, we're not going to the party. We've now sent two gifts to this couple for the child (baby shower and post-birth); neither one of which was ever acknowledged, not even in passing. So, the little princess will not receive anything further from us.

too funny! (and sad) If this is a new trend it hasn't hit Richmond yet....yeah! Maybe it is just that royal family...........I much prefer the kids who have "no gifts, bring food pantry or SPCA donation" parties............

[Crankin]

Ah, in my limited knowledge of all things Christmas, this is not normal. They sound like swell parents. I'd hate to meet that kid in about 10 years.

[indysteel]

Ah, in my limited knowledge of all things Christmas, this is not normal. They sound like swell parents. I'd hate to meet that kid in about 10 years.

Agreed.

While reading the mother's Facebook page one day, DH jokingly asked me if I wanted to be a "princess." "No," I replied rather vehemently. "I want to be, and am, a grown woman." My parents had many failings, but they at least didn't raise me to be spoiled or to wrongly think the world revolved around me. I could have handled a little more parent-inspired confidence, but in a lot of ways, I'm glad that I largely gathered the ground beneath my feet.

[Fredwina]

Well, I survived the writer's critique with ego intact and a solid plot, despite (or because of) having a sapient donkey as one of my characters.

[PamNY]

In case it wasn't clear from my snark, we're not going to the party. We've now sent two gifts to this couple for the child (baby shower and post-birth); neither one of which was ever acknowledged, not even in passing. So, the little princess will not receive anything further from us.

Your gifts should have been acknowledged, but beyond that, I wouldn't judge.

If you don't know these people in person, you can't really determine anything about them. I certainly wouldn't make a judgement based on what they've put on Facebook. What is posted on Facebook could be the opposite of what is going on in reality. It is common for what is reported about family life to be different from the truth.

I'm not sure about the trend question -- does it matter? People have parties for all kinds of silly reasons. I would make no assumptions based on that. For example, many people have "Christmas tree trimming parties," which I find puzzling and mildly repulsive. A party for a child makes more sense than a party for a dead tree.

If you have concerns about how these people are raising their child I would strongly suggest that you make direct, in-person observations.

From what I can tell, the minute a woman gives birth the world sets about judging her -- one reason I decided not to have children.

[Crankin]

Well, people judge about all kinds of things. It's one thing for children to feel loved and appreciated, which is necessary, but when anyone thinks he or she is a princess, or that the world revolves around them, it bodes for trouble later. I am not saying this as a result of watching what my friends have done, but as a professional in 2 different fields who works with families. I know what people put on Facebook is not always reality, but I have to agree with Indy here. I mean, I've let friendships drop because of stuff like this, or because of issues surrounding animals. I have kids, and I never felt that judged. I always did what I wanted to! I am sure some thought I was an evil working mother, but I knew what was right for me.

[indysteel]

My husband knows these people directly very well. I am confident that I have enough credible info to make some conclusions. Having a party at Christmas for a child so that this child receives even more stuff is excessive. I am perfectly comfortable making that judgment especially since I was invited to said party.

[indysteel]

As for Facebook and reality, this woman posts in great detail about the goings on that revolve around the child. If this is the reality she chooses to emphasize on Facebook, why is it up to me to remember that there may be a different reality? If you put your life on display, don't be surprised if people pass judgment about it. Please keep in mind that I don't think this woman is a bad person. I just think she was spoiled as a child and is in turn raising a spoiled child. There are worse things as a parent I suppose.

[Sky King]

so maybe someday, you will get to teach this child how to ride a bike or better yet, how to change a flat tire on a bike. We can only hope the other adults in her life will be a positive influence. I often feel sorry for kids in our land of plenty, it isn't their fault as no one gets to choose their parent.