Our very own humiliation/embarassment thread

[Nanci]

My first 5k race (running): I had never been a runner my whole life, and just took it up because my BF at the time was really into tri's. So I sign up for my first race, maybe a month after I started running, and I think my time was something like 50 minutes!!! _And_ the only runners I managed to beat were an 80 year old guy with a brand new hip replacement, and an 11 year old fat kid...

(Now, as Dianyla says, I am so used to being passed/dropped/last, I could care less any more. Whatever! I'm having fun!)

First date with current BF, or I should say first athletic date, we go MTBing on some pretty tame trails. First, I fall for no reason in the grass parking lot, then proceed to fall two more times while riding! I bet he was _really_ impressed!

Nanci

[bikerchick68]

I'm glad you started this thread!

OK... when I was really new my now ex-husband explained about watching for grooves in the road... and not to get your front tire in one... I didn't equate that with trolley tracks tho... we were out and I dropped the front tire into the trolley track because I didn't quite cross over it... and I stopped when I hit the curb on the other side... endo onto the sidewalk at the stoplight, bike on top of me... traffic ALL screeched to a stop... apparently they all needed to see the dumb newbie crashing...

I did Tour de Poway this year with friends... on my race bike in my full gear... there was some dude on a rusty old mtn bike in flip flops and board shorts... that dropped us like a rock and didn't even appear to be sweating...

I got a speed wobble at 47mph when I came out from behind the hill onto the overpass that is part of that downhill... how I kept the bike upright I'll never know... I don't race that downhill stretch anymore...

and Xmas Eve, for the first time ever I crossed my front tire into the back tire of the person I was drafting... the bike reacted much like a slingshot... sending me straight out into the oncoming traffic lane at 18mph, weaving like a drunk, one foot unclipped and water bottle flying across the road... I did not crash and fortunately there was no traffic. I woulda cried if I wrecked my bike...

[Grog]

I did Tour de Poway this year with friends... on my race bike in my full gear... there was some dude on a rusty old mtn bike in flip flops and board shorts... that dropped us like a rock and didn't even appear to be sweating...

There's a cyclist who's pretty well known in Quebec, I can't remember his name but he was Lynn Bessette's (one of our female pro-racer and olympian in both road and mountain) coach at some point, probably an ex-elite racer himself. He was always biking around on an old clunker, dressed exactly as you describe, plus usually a buttonned-down shirt, with his small dog in a basket attached to his handlebars. He would do the whole Grand Tour (a 7-8 day supported ride with a couple days of major hills usually) this way, too.

Rumor has it that on the first day of training he would meet Bessette at the Gilles-Villeneuve Course (where they have the Grand Prix in Montreal, a favorite spot for cyclists because of the smooth 5,5 km loop of top-notch pavement with one lane closed to cars). He would make her do her first workouts on some old rusty bike. Not sure how she was dressed, but in any case she certainly passed every Colnago and Cervélo around that morning, "humbling" a couple of guys. Of course they didn't know who she was.

So the take-home message is: I think more than a few elite racers have an old clunker they like to use to have fun on the bike and enjoy their sport instead of focusing on speed and performance. So next time you're passed by one of these, you can always think that to yourself, and not be embarassed.

[Dianyla]

bikerchick68's trolley tracks experiment reminded me of another incident. Here in Portland we have these highly illustrative signs for bicyclists near most train tracks:


Every time I see one of these I wince at the memory. I think they used me as the model for this drawing, and I've still got a lovely road tattoo on my elbow from this. Though, I think I was in too much pain to feel embarrassed.

[AuntieK]

My most memorable oopsie was when I went out for a ride with Super-Amazing-Cyclist Woman. At the end of the ride, on the way back to our cars, she dropped me bad and ended up waiting for me by my car. As I come cruising into the parking lot, I realized that my cleat must be frozen to the pedal (this was New Year's Eve, and it was cold and started snowing shortly after the ride). Whatever it was, I could NOT unclip! So, I could either run into Super-Amazing-Cyclist Woman, or I could hit my own car. I choose the car. I jerked hard on the handlebar, bonked into my back bumper, and fell over. Finally, mid-fall, the cleat unclipped. She didn't laugh, but I'm sure she was laughing on the inside...I must have looked mighty funny.
Once I got home I realized that the handlebar jerk had broken my computer wire.

[Tater]

I had finally gotten a sleek new road bike with clipless pedals after years of riding mountain bikes with and without rat-traps. I had practiced clipping in and out from the comfort of my own living room before daring to take the show on the road. I even rode across the yard a couple times clipping in and out, just in case I fell, the grass would cushion the blow. Finally, I decide to head out...down the hill to the signal, slowed down, unclipped one side, negotiated the red light just fine. Half mile down the road, a stop sign appears and suddenly, I forget that I am clipped to my pedals! I think the crash happened in slow motion, because I felt myself ever-so-slowly tipping to the left, then down on my rump. I wasn't hurt, more importantly, the bike was unharmed, but as I was untangling myself from the bike, a car pulled up beside me. Down rolls the passenger side window, 'Are you okay?' a woman asks. As my cheeks flame, I nod and say yes. I am sure she drove off thinking I was some sort of clod!

[bcipam]

OK this didn't happen while riding but did happen on a bike ride.

About 10 years ago I did a Backroads ride through coastal Oregon. The ride was tough plus, well, the Backroads food was not suiting my delicate tastes. On the second to last day, they served Oatmeal for breakfast. I hate Oatmeal and to make it worse, there was no sugar or milk. Ugh, "dry" Oatmeal!

This was a camping trip so I got my Oatmeal and was *****ing all the way to the picnic table. 3 people were seated on one side. 2 on the other. I sat between the two. As soon as I sat, the 3 on the other side got up. No one realized the table was on an angle, pointing down on my side. The table started to flip. The two on either end where able to bail, but since I was in the middle, I got stuck. The table flipped over, I landed on my back - legs straight up. The bowl of oatmeal flipped into the air and came straight down on my crotch. I am not making this up! Of course, it was the fuinniest thing anyone had ever seen before. Most got sick from laughing. I just remember having to sit under a faucet trying to clean the crotch of my shorts (my only other pair had been washed the night before and were wet).

To finish out my beautiful day, I got a flat and found out I had the wrong tube (Shrader v presta) and later that day, trying to catch the group, I hit some rail road tracks wrong, flipped over the bike, landed on my head and shoulder and was unconcious a few moments. I got to spend my last day in Oregon in the hospital. Will never forget that trip that's for sure! And t this day, I won't eat Oatmeal!

[Trekhawk]

bcipam - sorry but I am laughing thats so funny.....not the bit about the fall and hospital though thats just scary.

[bentforlife]

but on a greenbroke horse as a teenager(eons ago) We're weaving through the rows of pecan trees when she decides she's tired of being ridden. She takes me right at a branch that's about chest level. We were cantering pretty fast, so the only choice I have is to grab the branch and hang on.

I looked pretty funny hanging about 4.5 feet from the ground in this pecan tree. My sisters finally turned their horses around to help me down AFTER they were through laughing!!

She actually turned out to be one of the best riding horses we owned, after she bucked me off bareback, scraped me off on the side of the barn and rabbit hopped me a couple of times also. I miss having a horse at times, but my knees don't Have to really enjoy my bike now. At least I'm in control(most of the time).

Donna

[ace]

I got my first pair of padded bike shorts in June. For about the first two weeks I wore them, everytime I got out of the saddle they'd get caught and I'd almost moon many carloads of people. Got me into the habit of wearing underpants under my shorts ;-)