Dear So and So

[limewave]

Dear Mom and Dad,

Yes, we are all very proud of my brother. And I wouldn't mind reading through all the newspaper articles and even watching a news clip or two, but I don't really care to have them shoved in my face. I just got back from racing in the country's largest xc race . . . and I didn't do too shabby. It would have been nice if you feigned interest. Ask me how the race went, the weekend, etc. before bombarding us with all the spectacular! details of my brother's life.

I spent most of my childhood years being dragged to my brother's events. I'm not angry at you, it was alright. Sometimes it does make me sad. I can't help but wonder what I would have done had I been given the opportunities that he had. But I'm happy now. I had to move to a new town, but it worked. I managed to become someone other than "the little sister . . . he has a sister?" Did you even notice???

Dear SIL--Yay for you! You're married to my brother! It's like being Prom Queen for the rest of the life. You have achieved status! Woooooo!

Dear Self--wow, you're more bitter than I thought. Let it go. Let it go . . . this too shall pass. You're not 14 anymore. You've achieved many awesome things on your own and made a wonderful life for yourself Take deep breaths, count to 10.

Dear DH's friends--stop calling me "the little sister" or I will beat your @ss. Oh wait, I already did. I smoked you at Iceman! Hah! Hahahahahahahaha!

[indysteel]

((((Limewave)))). Out of curiosity, have you ever expressed any of that to your parents? Do you think you could? Sometimes I have to remind myself with my own parents that I do have a voice now and can express my needs in ways that I couldn't as a child. I'm often surprised at how well they respond to it. Of course, I try to be civil about it and use a lot of "I" statements.

[SheFly]

Dear Software Gods -

Thanks for nothing. I'm going off to cry now.

Dear Limewave -

Getting parents to ask about bike races is difficult - I've done over 500, and they only just this year started to ask how they went. BUT - YAY you! And I might put that race on the bucket list...

SheFly

[Pax]

Limewave - I feel for you, it was the same way in my house. The family went to every pee wee basketball and later football game my brother played, even though he sat the bench... I lettered for four years in softball and tennis and my folks never came, not once.

[indysteel]

My parents ignored all three of their children equally.

[limewave]

My parents ignored all three of their children equally.

lol.

Now that I'm a parent I realize things just aren't that easy. And there are far worse things in life than having to follow my brother around Going to take a bubble bath and enjoy a glass of wine then be done with it. Too many other things to be thinking about!

[OakLeaf]

(((((limewave)))))

Although I've known for years how lucky I was not to have any brothers (achievements done by mere females would just have to be enough ), it's been more recently that I've understood that I was also super lucky that my parents didn't care what I did in sports. It's the only thing I have that's never been anything but mine in my own head. It's possible they're not doing your brother any favors, either ... just a thought.

[HillSlugger]

Limewave,

My brother and I were always into different things and growing up I was the one most likely to be out doing something. As adults, I found biking and triathlon and he found dance. My mom likes to talk about my brother's dance, but my biking and triathlon stuff is "crazy". I finally had to speak up and tell her to quit it. It felt good to get it out, and it has helped. (hugs)

[lph]

Dear self,

get a grip. Not everybody has to like you. You can take it, you're a big girl now. Honest.

And while you're at it, stop being embarrassed for feeling this way. It's natural. But you can still let it go. It's not a big deal. Life is just like that.

[alexis_the_tiny]

((((Limewave)))), family...can be like that. On the other hand

"It's like being Prom Queen for the rest of the life. You have achieved status! Woooooo!"

I just love that statement.

Roxy, awww, thanks.

lph, it's alright to feel the way you do. It's what you choose to do with it that really matters in the end anyway.

[Catrin]

My mom is still in the hospital, her oxygen levels are poor and there is a concern that she might be developing something in her lungs She is in good hands, this is just a very rough time for her. Lung surgery isn't a cake walk but with emphysema at the same time...

I didn't have enough time off work to stay until she was released so now I am on the "text" chain from my sister.

[indysteel]

My mom is still in the hospital, her oxygen levels are poor and there is a concern that she might be developing something in her lungs She is in good hands, this is just a very rough time for her. Lung surgery isn't a cake walk but with emphysema at the same time...

I didn't have enough time off work to stay until she was released so now I am on the "text" chain from my sister.

((((Catrin)))). I'm so sorry things aren't going more smoothly. I'll redouble my effort to send healing vibes your mom's way. Hang in there and keep us posted.

[Blueberry]

Dear Mom:

I gave you a car. You transferred the title before that little thing that I asked you to wait for happened. OK - you're a brat who can't be an adult and wait. I expected that. Would it have been too hard to turn in the tags while you were at it so I could take the car off my insurance? I know you didn't have the tools and there wasn't someone handy to do it for you - but really? Are you really telling me that you don't have time to accomplish that *this year*?

[Biciclista]

oh Blueberry
you can't just take her off your insurance??? what a nightmare!

Catrin,
having been on the "inside" of the hospital for the last 2 weeks, i have a clue. ((((Catrin)))) it's hard enough for someone as healthy as my husband was.

[indysteel]

Dear Mom:

I gave you a car. You transferred the title before that little thing that I asked you to wait for happened. OK - you're a brat who can't be an adult and wait. I expected that. Would it have been too hard to turn in the tags while you were at it so I could take the car off my insurance? I know you didn't have the tools and there wasn't someone handy to do it for you - but really? Are you really telling me that you don't have time to accomplish that *this year*?

Admittedly, I don't know much about your situation with your mom, but why are you helping her again? I mean, I know she's your mom, but she doesn't sound particularly grateful or gracious.