Dear So and So

[Pax]

Boy, I'm on a roll in this thread....

Dear In-laws:

For the love of God, please try something new for a change. I was hoping with your upcoming visit that we could perhaps do something outside your norm, i.e., outside the cheap kitsch that is Nashville, Indiana or the (God help me) packed outlet mall. I thought by suggesting an antiques mall in Indy that I wouldn't be straying too far outside your comfort zone, but I guessed wrong apparently. Yes, their website has a few pictures of Victorian pieces, but that doesn't mean that the entire mall is "too fancy." But what does it matter anyway? None of us are in the market to buy anything more than a tricket; it's just someplace to go and something to do that's slightly more interesting than mindless shopping with the masses. Live a little for Pete's sake.

Signed,

Your increasingly annoyed DIL

Right there with you Indy, I take my mom shopping on Sundays... Aldi and Wal Mart (with an occasional side trip to Kohls) every frigging week! I suggest doing something a bit different and get looked at like I'm suggesting she shave her head and get a tattoo. *sigh*

[indysteel]

Right there with you Indy, I take my mom shopping on Sundays... Aldi and Wal Mart (with an occasional side trip to Kohls) every frigging week! I suggest doing something a bit different and get looked at like I'm suggesting she shave her head and get a tattoo. *sigh*

Apparently, my in-laws have now "relented" and have agreed to go to the antique mall. I look forward to being held responsible if they don't enjoy it. I'm going to try not to take it personally. What I've learned over the last couple of years is that there is no pleasing them. Even when they do exaclty what they want to do, they don't appear to enjoy themselves. For our last visit, we met them in Nashville, Indiana on a weekend when we were camping/mtbing at a nearby park. They drove 2 1/2 hours and spent 2 hours with us before heading back. After they left, I said to DH: "I feel bad; they didn't seem to be having any fun." To which he replied: "When do they ever seem to have fun?" Good point.

I get all worked up when I have to spend time with them, in part because their attitude about life just thoroughly depresses me. While they do have some health issues, they act like they're a good 10-15 years older than they are (MIL is in her late 60s; FIL is in his early 70s). They don't do much with their time and certainly little out of the ordinary. They have no outside living area at their home, so they mostly just sit in a dimly lit room all day. For fun, they might go to Subway for lunch and then to Walmart. My FIL, in particular, worries about everything and never relaxes. He has to be in control of every little thing. Every. Little. Thing. It's maddening.

In that regard, he and I have butted heads a few times already. His only son--my husband--is a pretty laid back guy. I think he mostly just tunes him out and does what he wants. His wife is mostly passive. I, however, am not. I like boundaries. I like to be treated like the 42 year-old adult that I am. His son is younger than me by more than a few years, and I don't know that either of his parents were quite prepared for him to marry an older woman with an established home and successful career. I've tried to cut them slack, but when push comes to shove, I'm not afraid to assert myself or ask that he back off. I'd like to think that we're past the worst of that, but it's taken a toll on our relationship all the same.

Anyway, I struggle with all of this. My own parents are very challenging, too. I have to admit that I had hoped to marry into a more functional family than my own. While I wouldn't go so far as to say that my in-laws are bad people or bad parents, they aren't exactly enjoyable or wholly emotionally healthy either. Admittedly, I have my own flaws, too, and I need to be more forgiving of them and kinder. I can be inflexible in my own way. So, lots of important stuff to work on......

[bmccasland]

Dear Press,
She's home. Stop repeating the story. I suppose it's asking too much to leave the chickie alone so she can wrap her head around breathing PNW air instead of Italian prison air.

Dear A,
I'm certain the press is falling all over itself about wanting to tell your story, making appointments to be on all the talk shows and all that, but remember, you made some dumb decisions that landed you in that mess.

[jessmarimba]

Dear Ohio historical project review lady:

Ok, we've established that I'm a moron, so can we get past that and you just explain to me how to (essentially) do your job for you? I hope making me cry made your day, because it pretty much ruined mine.

Signed,
the idiot in Colorado


Dear Starbucks,
The irony that I went to get coffee to cheer myself up, and your cup is slowly leaking all over my desk from the seam in the bottom...I don't even know what to say. I'm going to go curl up in bed and wait for this week to be over.

[emily_in_nc]

Awww Jess,

Sorry for your crappy week. Hope things improve, and soon.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear whatever bug is going around this time...seriously. STOP. I'm down (again), my co-teacher is down (again as well) and all the kids in class are going down one by one (YET AGAIN). We're all sick of being sick. GO AWAY.

On the bright side, we survived a month without anyone falling ill by paranoidly wiping everything down with alcohol every day, making the kids wash their hands every time we catch their fingers near their mouths and noses and using large amounts of that hospital grade hand sanitizer ourselves. So I guess that's one step in the right direction somewhere.

[indysteel]

(((Jess))). I hate when something makes me cry at work, especially when it's about work. I feel lousy for days. Hang in there.

(((Alexis))). I hope you and everyone else at school starts feeling better soon and that you stay that way.