Yelled at by moron and now discouraged

[7rider]

Any ideas on how to feel better about this and do better next time?

Congratulations!!!

You are now a cyclist!

[tangentgirl]

Congratulations!!!

You are now a cyclist!

Yup, it's a badge of honor.

Don't let that dimwit spoil everything you've accomplished. You've been riding and building your skills and strength and having fun. She's probably just a big knot of meanness and jealousy, and you never want those people to win, do you?

Have fun, ride safe!

[tulip]

Those encounters can be rattling. Passing on the right is illegal, but its hard to retain one's wits and get a license plate number in those situations. In my state, bicyclists are required to ride to the right, but I take the lane when it is safe and practical to do so, like an upcoming left turn. But if there are cars behind me, I generally let them go by. They are bigger than me.

You could always think of it this way: at least she saw you, which was your goal afterall.

[greyfeather]

Those encounters can be rattling. Passing on the right is illegal, but its hard to retain one's wits and get a license plate number in those situations. In my state, bicyclists are required to ride to the right, but I take the lane when it is safe and practical to do so, like an upcoming left turn. But if there are cars behind me, I generally let them go by. They are bigger than me.

You could always think of it this way: at least she saw you, which was your goal afterall.

Absolutely right. This was going through my mind after the fact.

I'll do better next time (I hope).

[Biciclista]

You could always think of it this way: at least she saw you, which was your goal afterall.

wow, this is great!!

[Melalvai]

greyfeather, I ride in any conditions but the worst thing to ride in is traffic, and among the worst experiences is when someone harasses me verbally or with their car. That is so demoralizing. The only thing that makes it tolerable for me is that I'm involved in local, state, and national bike/ped advocacy. (National is League of American Bicyclists, http://www.bikeleague.org/).

I would advise that you NOT engage anyone, don't respond, don't reply. That is really hard to do and it took me years to just let them go. It is by far the best response. You aren't going to change that particular person at this particular time. You'll have other opportunities to change people's minds about cyclists.

People DO change. I have faith that my advocacy efforts and donations help them change. One day you will talk to someone who will admit "I used to yell at cyclists" or "I used to think cyclists shouldn't be in my way", who feels differently now, because they know a real cyclist-- you-- a real cyclist who is a nice person, not whatever stereotype is in their head.

Thanks for sharing your struggles with us. I've been there, some days I'm still there.

[Crankin]

Well, I have engaged with a few (I really haven't had that many incidents in 11 years) and if anything, I hope it shook them up, the way they shook me up. Believe me, some dweebie high tech guy driving around Concord or Acton is not gonna shoot me. Especially the one who had his cringing 10 year old in the car. Great role model! On the other hand, I have called the police and reported stuff, too.
Knotted Yet, I spit my coffee out with your fish comment. Don't get me started. You hardly see those around here, thankfully, but I had my fill of them in AZ. Yeah, sure, your religion is better than mine...

[channlluv]

A few weeks ago I met my niece and her fiance to take their engagement photos. (I do portrait photography, and this is my wedding gift to them.) While walking to their favorite surf spot in a very cycling-friendly hippie surfer community just north of where I live, all three of us had to cross a dedicated bike lane separated from the main road and line of parked cars by a small curb. There were lots of walkers on the sidewalk and I realized we were walking in the bike lane, so I nudged my niece ahead of me to get up onto the sidewalk. She noticed it was the bike lane about the same time I did and with an "Oops, better move up," to her fiance, who replied with what was pretty much, F*** cyclists. "I knocked a cyclist off his bike once," and he shoves the air, mimicking doing it again. Thankfully, there weren't any cyclists close enoug to see or hear him.

"Why would you do that?" I asked, incredulous.

He immediately realized what he'd admitted to, as I had been talking for several minutes about keeping an eye out for DH who would be riding by soon with his bike club on their regular Saturday ride, and he started backpedaling. "Well, he was giving my best friend grief. He was yelling at us. And besides, my brother is a competitive cyclist, too, so I know all about it. And I was 18." And I'm betting a little drunk, too.

Uh-huh. I see. My first thought: Niece, are you sure this is the one?

She seemed immediately apologetic for him. I let it go, though.


I love Mimi's advice, and the point that that woman saw you, which was your goal.

As for fish on the car, I don't really mind people declaring their religion. What I mind is hypocritical behavior. Which safely-taking-the-lane cyclist would Jesus yell at, right?

Roxy

[marni]

Knotted Yet, I spit my coffee out with your fish comment. Don't get me started. You hardly see those around here, thankfully, but I had my fill of them in AZ. Yeah, sure, your religion is better than mine...

Oh Crankin, you would go crazy around here where almost every store clerk or receptionist at a medical office will gaily wish you a "blessed day." Even when I had surgery, although I had indicated that I did not want to be visited with a minister, the local chaplain showed up and offered to pray with me and my husband. When told to leave, he did so but did stop to offer up a prayer (hold us up to Jesus) just outside the door.

The nerve of some people.

marni

[greyfeather]

Thanks becky, 7rider, and tangentgirl. I'm going for a ride now.