Why a women's forum?

[indysteel]

This! You ladies understand these parts of my life too, not just the athletic parts, and that means a lot to me.

Add me to that list (well, I'm a cat mama, but still....). While I'm fortunate that I have friends IRL who share that same demographic, I still feel like a bit of an odd ball because I don't have kids and, for a long time, was still single. So, it's nice to have a forum where children and romantic relationships are not the focus. Not that I have anything against kids, women with kids, or relationships; it's just not something I want to talk about all the time.

[Catrin]

... So, it's nice to have a forum where children and romantic relationships are not the focus. Not that I have anything against kids, women with kids, or relationships; it's just not something I want to talk about all the time.

This I am the only single/divorced person my age I know who doesn't have kids. I would love to be a cat mama but allergies are too bad these days, therefore I am a bike-mama instead It is wonderful to be on a forum where relationships aren't the main focus.

I also would like go say that I really appreciate the level of literacy here and communication. Even in those times come when things get a little...warm, the flames do not get nearly as bad as other forums I've been on over the years. I think at least part of this is a result of our efforts over the years to get to know each other in person at every chance - which is another thing I like very much about TE.

[Kerry1976]

This I am the only single/divorced person my age I know who doesn't have kids. I would love to be a cat mama but allergies are too bad these days, therefore I am a bike-mama instead It is wonderful to be on a forum where relationships aren't the main focus.

Oh my goodness - this is so me - divorced/single with no kids. I would have a cat but my landlord doesn't allow it. I couldn't agree more!

[Crankin]

You know, I think this is also the reason I stayed with TE. I can't stand the constant blathering about kids that most women do and I have two kids! This was a serious problem for me when my children were small and it earned me the reputation of being "cold" in the eyes of neighbors and parents of my kids' friends (not my own friends). My older son castigated me for grading papers at his Little League games when he was 11 or 12, so I know the perception was probably true. I didn't want to engage in the kid boasting and teacher bashing that went on at such venues. And I must say, it continues... now the boasting centers on who is married, engaged, having kids, or in grad school/professional school.
A sort of related story. As my DH dropped me off in front of the arena for graduation and I was walking in with a colleague, I heard someone call my name. It was the mother of one of my younger son's HS friends, standing there with her daughter. The daughter was actually in another program in my department, something that made me feel very old! Anyway, she asked me who was graduating (duh, I was carrying my cap and gown) and I am sure she fully expected me to say the name of one of my kids. When I said it was me and that (jokingly) I felt the need to get another master's degree and change careers at age 57, she looked incredulous. Like I would have any other interests or desires at this age. This is a woman I've known tangentially for years and I could tell she just didn't get it.
And that is what I love about TE. You get it.

[Biciclista]

You know, I think this is also the reason I stayed with TE. I can't stand the constant blathering about kids that most women do and I have two kids! This was a serious problem for me when my children were small and it earned me the reputation of being "cold" in the eyes of neighbors and parents of my kids' friends (not my own friends).

Crankin, you're onto something very important about the atmosphere at TE.
It's not that we don't love our kids (I have two wonderful sons) but that we are actively trying to improve ourselves and not HIDING behind our kids to ignore our own lives. We all know women like that. Their own souls are obfuscated (OH I ALWAYS WANTED TO USE THAT WORD) by their kids. If you completely focus on your children, you can ignore the holes in your lives. Some women are like that with their partners too. If I natter on and on about my partner, I can ignore the fact that I am falling apart...

Here on TE we're all actively trying to improve our lives, what by riding bikes or running, eating better, setting a good example, pursuing education, reading good novels.... THAT is the cool thing about this community.

[maillotpois]

Crankin, you're onto something very important about the atmosphere at TE.
It's not that we don't love our kids (I have two wonderful sons) but that we are actively trying to improve ourselves and not HIDING behind our kids to ignore our own lives. We all know women like that. Their own souls are obfuscated (OH I ALWAYS WANTED TO USE THAT WORD) by their kids.

I like this observation! As one of the few working moms in my daughter's class I feel a bit out of it all - don't even bring up the double centuries and the 600k brevet. It's weird enough that I run my own business and work all over the Bay Area up to 10 hour days. And I love my kid (and my husband). But I have a life, too, and I'm always working on making it better/more interesting.

And I agree with V on the 60 thing.

[lph]

Their own souls are obfuscated (OH I ALWAYS WANTED TO USE THAT WORD)

That is a WONDERFUL word!

I love your points, both about not overengaging in our kids, and about few hangups about age.

[indysteel]

You know, I think this is also the reason I stayed with TE. I can't stand the constant blathering about kids that most women do and I have two kids! This was a serious problem for me when my children were small and it earned me the reputation of being "cold" in the eyes of neighbors and parents of my kids' friends (not my own friends). My older son castigated me for grading papers at his Little League games when he was 11 or 12, so I know the perception was probably true. I didn't want to engage in the kid boasting and teacher bashing that went on at such venues. And I must say, it continues... now the boasting centers on who is married, engaged, having kids, or in grad school/professional school.
A sort of related story. As my DH dropped me off in front of the arena for graduation and I was walking in with a colleague, I heard someone call my name. It was the mother of one of my younger son's HS friends, standing there with her daughter. The daughter was actually in another program in my department, something that made me feel very old! Anyway, she asked me who was graduating (duh, I was carrying my cap and gown) and I am sure she fully expected me to say the name of one of my kids. When I said it was me and that (jokingly) I felt the need to get another master's degree and change careers at age 57, she looked incredulous. Like I would have any other interests or desires at this age. This is a woman I've known tangentially for years and I could tell she just didn't get it.
And that is what I love about TE. You get it.

You've touched on another big reason that I like TE. IRL, I'm surrounded by woman who treat growing older like an affliction. They're not physically active, they often have a host of health issues, they don't aspire to do anything particularly new or dynamic with their lives or careers, etc., etc.

The women on TE, however, offer far more exciting and positive examples of what we can accomplish and do as we age. Yes, we usually admit that our bodies and minds are changing with age, but it's rare that I hear anyone here really let that stop them. I realize that at age 41, I'm hardly "old," but I do spend a fair amount of time thinking about what the next 30 or more years of my life are going to look like, especially since I have a younger husband that I'd very much like to keep up with. I want to be active and fully engaged in life year after year. You ladies really inspire me to do that and to think big.

[Biciclista]

I'm going to be 60 this year, that IS old. But I'm going to fight it every single step of the way.

And TE is one of the ways.

[Veronica]

I'm going to be 60 this year, ....

Really?

If I think about the age of your kids, it makes sense. But with the rides you do and your zest for life, I'd have guessed early 50s!

60 as a number sounds old, but the reality doesn't have to be. I think I like "experienced" better than old.

Veronica

[OakLeaf]

I'm going to be 60 this year, that IS old.

Naw. When I was 15, 60 was old. Now that I'm 51, 60 is young.


I do enjoy the range of ages we have here.

[Bike Writer]

I'm going to be 60 this year, that IS old. But I'm going to fight it every single step of the way.

And TE is one of the ways.

60 can't be old - heck I'm almost there myself! I'll go out on a limb and say that for the women of this forum 60 is the new 40. There are examples all around here of women doing things in their 50's and 60's that people stopped engaging in during their 40's in years past. Our stories are so inspirational to one another and a big contributing factor for what keeps people around here.

[Trek420]

Even in those times come when things get a little...warm, the flames do not get nearly as bad as other forums I've been on over the years.

That's because we can always ask "is it hot in here or is it just me?"

Also we do flame but articulately and well Who was it who said ... I think it was W. Churchill "Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip."

I <3 TE, long live TE

[sundial]

It all started with a pair of cycling shorts.

I came across TE when I was searching for a cycling short and found that TE offered the best selection of quality gear for ladies at an attractive price point. When I had a question about a product it was so nice to be able to talk to Susan personally to ask her opinion about a product and more often than not she would make a recommendation for something that was even more appropriate for my body type and distance riding. I cannot express enough my appreciation for that kind of customer service. TE continues to lead the industry in that respect.

When I joined the forum, I found it to have a very civil tone as set forth by the moderators and it continues to be so to this day. It is refreshing to be able to come here to express our opinions, which are generally well received in a safe and supportive environment. I appreciate the different perspectives from various cultures as it has prompted me to do some soul searching on several occasions. I continue to be amazed at how we can connect with others on an emotional level through a portal.

I do wish Susan and her company continued success and may we enjoy the benefit of their labors.