Ignorant People!!

[Fuji Girl]

I hear ya!!!!!

People ask me ALL the time if I'm pregnant! Strangers, people at work, neighbors. I AM SO SICK OF IT. In fact, it's offensive. I was always really skinny, then I had cancer and gained a ton of weight. Lost some of it, went on steroids, gained it back. For a girl who could always eat whatever she wanted, the extra 50 pounds was quite a shock. And it's not made any easier by people making comments about my weight, no matter what their intentions are. I don't care if they didn't mean anything by it, it's almost worse that they would hurt me so deeply and "not mean anything by it." It's so cruel. One woman at work ran up to me and patted by belly, saying "do we have something in here?" in front of everyone. I was mortified. All I could croak out was "Yeah, it's called fat" and walked away.

Now when it happens, I call them on it. It's happened so often, I have a pat answer for them, "What makes you think it's appropriate to ask such a question? Do you realize how that hurts my feelings? Do I come up to you and ask you about your thinning hair/fat ***/obnoxious laugh? No, I don't. And for future reference, I would appreciate it if you would keep your hurtful assessments of my appearance to yourself."

That usually shuts them up. But not always.

[bcipam]

As a person that sometimes says something that seems clueless I would like to add I don't think people generally are trying to be rude. I realize any of us, at any time, can say something stupid. I never intend to hurt someone's feelings and thinking about that when someone says something stupid to me, I usually just smile and say nothing. If my feeling are hurt it's because I'm too sensitive. So if someone asks if I am pregnant (and that has happened)... I guess I need to lose weight. I would just laugh, tell the person, no I just need to stop eating twinkies and move on. Now if I think someone is intending to be rude, I would ask why they said that. It makes that person stop and think why they said that. Usually I get an apology. I accept it and move on. No sense dwelling over it. Life is way to short.

[Hell-uv-a-job]

If asked if I am pregnant I just say with a straight face: "No. I am not Pregnant... I am just fat". I just love that embarracement look in their faces.

I have no problem with it, it does not bother me. I suffered enough already because of my weight and I just don't care anymore. I just try to work out for my health.

[SadieKate]

How about "No, I'm just fat. There's a cure for it. [Insert pregnant silence and "the look" here.]"

[Lise]

Unfortunately, you had already spoken to her. Otherwise you could pretend not to understand. Strategies I've used in the past: Point at my ears and shake my head. Say, "Talla inte engleska" ("I don't speak English", in Swedish). I know it's completely silly, but it distracts them, and then you run away!

I understand the pissed off feeling, and I suspect she was just trying to be friendly, unaware of how MISERABLY she failed! The darned thing is, she probably doesn't even know what an Ironman is. If you see her again, you could tell her what you're going to do in April, and watch her gasp for breath. That would be amusing!

You go on with your long distance running self! I ran 4.5 miles yesterday with a friend, and boy am I sore today! Can't believe I was running those long training runs last summer.

I am excited for you to bring your baby home tomorrow, and looking forward to seeing the pix! Lise

[Running Mommy]

yeah maybe I am a bit on the sensitive side. I guess that comes from always being the chubby girl. My doctor and I are going to work on finding out why after Ironman. I just don't want to deal with it right now. I eat really well, keep a food log on fitday.com and everything. I do have a raging sweet tooth, but I try to keep that in check. I'm a freak I suppose. I started some testing last fall and they determined that I have 116 lbs of muscle and 7 lbs of bone. Now on a 5'1" frame that's ALOT! Like I said in previous posts my doctor says I have the frame of a 6'2" man!! So no matter what I'm always going to look "chunky". But it sure doesn't help when people make rude comments like that. And you can sugar coat it anyway you want but the bottom line was I've never met this lady in my life. And it may have just been HER ignorance to why someone would be out running, but she should have kept her trap shut!
Anyway, like I said I'm probably overly sensitive, but I'm trying to work on it. I've really tried to embrace my stumpiness and realize that it's just the way my body is. It's just hard. When I see all these super fit looking tri chicks out there who look AWESOME in their little zoot tri kits and I know that I work just as hard as they do, and I could never wear a one piece tri suit. Well I COULD, but it would not be pretty!
And I won't even get into trying to find a wetsuit I can get my log legs in! OY!! Read the slow fat triathlete and you'll know what I deal with! lol

[Steph_in_TX]

I'm impressed by anyone who runs at all. I've always said that the only time you'll find me running is when I'm being chased!

I'm noticing more and more that some "older" people tend to say whatever is on their mind and the older they get, the worse it gets. It's like any thought that pops in their head just flys out the mouth...there's no edit function! Not sure why that is, but it's definitely not good for those on the receiving end of their comments.

[Nanci]

Geez, I'd be angry at my doctor for saying that. If you _had_ the frame of a 6'2" man, you _wouldn't_ be 5'1". Whatever. Maybe he just meant you had strong bones, not little bird bones.

I was thinking that, too, the poor lady is probably wondering what Ironman is...

I asked a co-worker once if she was pregnant. She was barely big- she just had that look. She replied "no," but then announced not two weeks later that she was, and hadn't known at the time I asked!

When my daughter was a baby, I used to carry her in this snuggly, _inside_ my sweatshirt. People would always ask when my baby was due, and I'd say "She's already here!" and lift up my sweatshirt.

The first organized bike ride I did, 37 miles of the Horrible Hundred, a year ago last October, we rode past like a frat row or something near the end. Some guys were out on the balcony, and one started yelling "Look at the fatty on the bike!" I'm like, "Hey, at least I'm _on_ the bike..."

Nanci

[tprevost]

RunningMommy,

I hope that she went home and slapped herself for having such a stupid thing come out of her mouth! ... sometimes our brains don't work so well spur of the moment, then we cringe later ... anyway, she can only dream of doing what you do every day and is probably very envious! (just like I am!)

BTW, your pics are wonderful and you look SO great after you've trained! I turn reddish purple and stay that way for a long time - you just look cute!

Keep it up, you're awesome! AND, don't forget, we are all waiting for those bike pics!!!

Tracy

[pkq]

Yeah, I'd be one of those ignorant people mulling over in the back of mind, "If it works for her, it might work for me. If she says 'yes,' I might have to give it a go." Yep, I've been that ignorant before with other things. I love learning from other people. It makes my life so much easier. Call me lazy, too.

[ladyfish]

being a diver, I have several places that I can give you that make custom suits. Sounds expensive, but really isn't that much more than off the rack, and it will fit!

email me if you'd like the info!

[FelesRidet]

My weight is perfect for my height, which varies.

[susiej]

Loved the pictures! So impressed that you've done multiple tris.

--SJ

[KSH]

People ask me ALL the time if I'm pregnant! Strangers, people at work, neighbors. I AM SO SICK OF IT.

I learned in the Second grade to NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant.

I was in class, and I think I yelled out, "Mrs. Anabel are you pregnant!". She replied, "No", and promptly dragged me into the hall and told me that you NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant. Never forgot that lesson.

At my last job... there was a lady in my group who started to look larger... and even wore a shirt saying something like "Special Package"... but there was no way in hell I asking. I think when she hit around 5 months she finally told me. But I wasn't asking.

I am so sorry to hear about how the meds made you gain so much weight. How frustrating that must be. I don't even know what I would do if my weight and controling it was completely out of my hands. At least you have your life and your health... that is what matters in the end.

[bcipam]

Runningmommy... OK so you are sensitive about your size... geez who isn't. Even little skinny girls (I hate them! ) complaint abut their weight. I wish I could even think about training for Ironman. Do you realize how "studdly" that is? Be proud of your acheivement and accomplishments. Next time someone makes what you feel is a rude comment, smile and tell them what you are training for and leave it at that. Trust me - they will be jealous of your ability. I am!