ADHD in adults

[Crankin]

Mimi, my kids most definitely did not sit at home and play computer games. They were exploring in the woods and playing sports, creating art, and playing music. But, neither of them could remember anything. They still both have terrible short term memory. My younger son was called "la-la" boy, because it seemed like he was in la-la land. Academically, they were both above average. But, the older one never did his homework and lost everything, until he got to 11th grade and college was looming. He couldn't take medication, but my younger son did for 7 years. He took himself off of it when he went to HS, but doing homework for AP classes took a toll on him. Cycling was the last in a very long chain of "obsessions" he had. While he wasn't hyperactive in school, he is impulsive about many things and gets bored easily... hence joining the Marines. It's all a part of ADHD. He's very successful, but in a way, this is a typical pattern of underachievement for someone with ADHD. I can't tell you how many times he has been asked by commissioned officers, "Why are you an enlisted Marine? Did you take the SATs? Did you go to private school?" because of his vocabulary and general knowledge, compared to others who enlist. If you met him, you might not know he has ADHD, but I smiled when I heard his wife say, "He can walk past me and not remember a thing I say." Yeah, he doesn't.
My other son was fine once he got to college and could study what he wanted to. Of course, he had a few "extended deadlines" and incompletes that took a few weeks to finish, but he has been a star in his professional career. Yet, he doesn't remember things or organize his personal stuff well; we laugh about it now, but I am glad his wife sort of helps him deal with it.

[Biciclista]

Crankin, you're describing my family members too. Both of my sons were total disasters in school until almost the last year of high school. Now my younger son is going for his PhD in pure math while the older is still bobbing along the river of life.

zoom-zoom the pesticide stuff sounds really scary!

[zoom-zoom]

WR, I'm really glad that you have a diagnosis...it's that whole "knowledge is half the battle" thing. Now you have a starting point, which is excellent. Please continue to keep us posted on things.

[Crankin]

Azurah, psychologists cannot prescribe medication in any state in the US. You must have been seeing a psychiatrist, or your therapist was working with a doctor who prescribed for him/her.
You need to find a different therapist. One who really knows his/her stuff, both about ADHD and anxiety. Therapy for a year, with no abatement of severe anxiety symptoms isn't right. This is interfering with your work.

[WindingRoad]

So I keep reading about some of the typical issues involved with ADHD. I continue to run across articles saying CYCLING is a sport highly recommended to help alleviate the symptoms. Some even say it fills that Impulsivity void we have. I just can't believe how much things are starting to make sense now. From the explosive anger moments to reading 5 books at a time, good lord I wish I had know this about 15 years ago. I'm not complaining though.

I do realize I'm going to have to rid myself of a lot of my preconceived notions about my rocky elementary and high school years. It was a horrible experience really; I was so frustrated with everything that I literally made bubble pictures on my SAT back in high school There is a point when you just can't fight it anymore and you just give in the to "bad student" label. All I can say is by all means if you suspect your kids of having ADHD, please have them evaluated and don't put them through the emotional roller coaster I had to go through. I think its worse for girls too, bc we already have issues with image and self esteem. Throwing a learning issue into the mix really screws with your confidence.

[Crankin]

I once read the teacher comments on my DH's report cards from early elementary school. I was astonished. One said "Something is wrong here..I don't know what, but something is very wrong. Steve is very smart, but cannot focus..."
Some of the comments were just plain mean. I couldn't imagine what would have happened if I had written that stuff when I was teaching. But, people just didn't know in the early sixties. My DH got almost a perfect score when he took the SATs and he was accused of having someone take the test for him, because, well, how could someone like him do that?
So, yes, the self esteem issues that are part of ADHD are not small things at all.

[zoom-zoom]

One of my son's preschool teachers told us that Dane couldn't be ADHD, since he could hyper-focus on things he enjoyed to the exclusion of everything else.

Duh, that is one of the hallmarks of ADHD! We went another 2 years without pursuing any sort of diagnosis because of that woman's "assessment."

Then kindergarten screeners recommended we hold him back...because he had no focus during the session (put a little car/truck-obsessed boy in a room full of his favorite toys and what do you expect, people?).

This is the same boy who now scores advanced on state standardized tests. Holding him back would have been a disaster. Instead of being just ADHD he would have been bored to tears and ADHD. Bucking their recommendation and enrolling him in an Montessori kindergarten (and subsequently a Montessori Elem. school) was the best thing we ever did for our kid. It was at that kindergarten that the school director recognized instantly that our kid was perfectly ready for kindergarten. She also worked with us and our son's pediatrician through the diagnosis process. Rather than writing him off as a "problem child," as previous educators had.

[zoom-zoom]

My other son was fine once he got to college and could study what he wanted to.

This was my experience, as well (I'm sure it didn't hurt that I was paying my own tuition, too...not easy to slack-off when investing that kind of dough). But I HAD to keep a day planner and get everything done well in advance. I still have to plan my workouts, as well, or else I don't get them in or I lose motivation.

It helped that I was so busy in college with work and school that I didn't have time to waste. I do best when I am under the gun.