what's wrong with trying a Brooks? people have been riding them for 100 years.
Just did a 68 mile ride Saturday (I'm 59 years old and way past menopause if you catch my drift) on my road bike with a B68 Brooks Imperial and my crotch was one of the few parts of me that wasn't hurting.
I am not sure about what is getting your toes, but geez, try a Brooks, it might solve both problems.
Welcome to TE.