new rider with training partner issues

[Trek420]

It's the only thing I dislike about cycling other than that events start soooo early in the morning; all the *&^% sorting. "I ride 30-40 miles brisk pace, you like 50 - 60 miles dizzyingly fast pace on the flats, she's riding 20 miles slow but loooooves hills ...." Can we ride together? Mmmmaybe, maybe not.

Options could include but are not limited to ;
you bring beater/errand/fixed gear bikes she brings road bike.
do a spin class together.
cross train together.
do the same ride, she rides her pace you do hill repeats*
find a local club with tiers. Meet at start/finish/recovery meal

*there's a possibility of her feeling bad as you do the hill 5 times as she rides up it once but whatever. As long as she's training she will get there too. You encourage and inspire her and sip a recovery beverage as you wait at the top.

[andiewest]

Thanks for brainstorming all those suggestions. I think I will try the hill repeats. Our LBS is just starting a woman's club ride, so I think that might suggest that we do that together.

Did a spin and strength training class today. It was an awesom workout.

Andie

[redrhodie]

you bring beater/errand/fixed gear bikes she brings road bike.

I love this idea. Here's some more:

You could adjust your brake so it's rubbing a little. I've done a few too many newbie miles with a rubbing brake. It definitely slows you down.

Wear a large windbreaker and let her draft.

Carry her gear. My bf makes me do this when we ride to the beach, and then drops me. He's a real prince.

Put heavy tires on your bike, and make sure hers are pumped to the max.

Actually, are you sure her bike doesn't have an issue? Maybe it's not her. Sometimes, it's the bike.

[Trek420]

... her comment that she hates every moment on the bike means she doesn't really want to be there.

Actually, are you sure her bike doesn't have an issue? Maybe it's not her. Sometimes, it's the bike.

I felt the same way before I got my namesake bike fit; loved the sport and the idea of riding but hated being on the bike. Has she had the bike fit?

Invite her to TE .... after deleting this thread

I love this idea. Here's some more:

Her fast training days become your recovery ride.

[Tri Girl]

I'm stuck on the remark that she hates every moment of riding. We all know that when you do a century, by about mile 70 finishing is FAR more mental than physical at that point. If she's already mentally out of the game from the start, even if she can keep a fast pace, there's no way she'll finish if she's hating it. Mind over matter and all- and if you mind then it doesn't matter how fast you're moving- it's going to be a horrible experience.

I wonder if maybe the three of you could do an overnight tour. A S24O (sub 24 hour overnight bike trip). Touring is always a more relaxed pace anyway, and that way you guys could still do the cycling thing together, but it would be a different mindset. Heck- you could carry all the gear in a BOB trailer and she could ride gear-free and then your paces might match. Pack up the camping gear, ride to a state park and camp out overnight and make it a girls weekend, then ride home the next day. Or just throw some overnight things in a day pack and ride to another town and stay at a B&B and make a girls weekend out of it.

Just saying... she seems to not enjoy cycling, so maybe if you made it more casual/fun she'd still feel a part of the "cycling trio" without having to push the training like you need to do when training for a century. You two could still do your century, and leave the more relaxed pace for a weekend getaway every couple months.

[Pedal Wench]

The reality is that perhaps even with all the training in the world, your paces might never match. Putting that expectation before any of you got on bikes in the first place might be a great excuse to re-evaluate the entire ride.
To make her feel better, maybe tell her how amazing it would be if she was your personal support crew on the ride. That way she's involved, helping, there at the start and finish, and she's not hating every minute of the ride.

[andiewest]

Wow, I am so impressed by all of your creativity and thoughtfulness.

A large part of it is the bike. She is riding a very upright comfort type bike, whereas we are both riding road bikes. I have offered to let her use one of my bikes but she has not taken me up on that offer. I spoke to her yesterday and she said that she is buying a bike this weekend and is committed to training on her own. I question the wisdom of buying a bike when she hates cycling, but . . .

I spoke with my other training partner today. As we are doing a metric century in 5 weeks (my reluctant riding friend is not doing this ride), we need to build up our distance. Before each ride we will let rr(reluctant rider) know if it is a training ride (what our speed and distance will be) or if it is a recovery ride. She can decide if she wants to join in. The problem is that we are doing a lot of indoor training as she weather is cold and the nights are dark, so we often just do one or two rides on the road each week. Sometimes not even that if the ground is covered with snow or if it is pouring rain (we live in the Pacific Nw).

I like the idea of a weekend ride that is more relaxed. Unfortunately, as we are all mothers of young kids, the century ride in July is really our only chance to get away without our kids.

She told me yesterday, that her husband (who is an avid cyclist) is furious with me and our other cycling friend. He said that we are not following cycling etiquette and we that we must never drop the slowest rider. We do get far ahead of her, but we usually stop every 10-15 minutes to let her catch up. When she catches up she often says something like "slow and steady wins the race". She almost never appears out of breath or as though she is pushing herself.

Anyway, our friendship was not founded on cycling. Our husbands all ride together and they have been urging us for years to take it up. I really just want to go out and enjoy my rides.

Andie

[jessmarimba]

Maybe for longer rides that she can't complete yet, you two start early and then meet her for the last third or so? Hopefully then your being more tired combined with her being fresh would help keep you guys together.

I think her husband needs to understand that if she insists on riding the comfort bike and not training during the week she is somewhat resigning herself to not keeping up. She may never be as fast or strong as you guys, but she's not even meeting you halfway.

[Tri Girl]

Furious, huh?

Tell her husband to help her train if he is such an avid cyclist.

Ha! +1

[Biciclista]

Furious, huh?

Tell her husband to help her train if he is such an avid cyclist.

no kidding!

[indysteel]

Furious, huh?

Tell her husband to help her train if he is such an avid cyclist.

Ha + 2.

I'd be really surprised if they haven't gone several rounds themselves--the relunctant rider and her husband--about their own cycling imcompatability.