Weird experience

[Crankin]

I guess it was weird because it was obvious I was not in writhing pain, just a normal chronic sports injury. I understand the techs see people in all kinds of horrible conditions, and I wouldn't want that job. I do not assume everyone who goes to the hospital is an uneducated, unhealthy slob; but my DH got the same attitude when he kept going to the doctor for chest pain... until finally he had to practically grab the doctor's coat and insist on an angioplasty, after a particularly horrible incident on a ride. Yes, people who are in great shape *do* have medical stuff.
I think I'm getting overly sensitive in my old age; I don't like it when I get "compliments" regarding the shape I am in (most of the time said in a tone, like "good job, how do you do it, because I can't") or, more recently, I'm spoken to like I am an idiot, which tends to occur when a medical person sees my actual birthday and they know how old I am. But that's another issue.
It's not that I don't like compliments, but it feels sort of back handed to me.

[KnottedYet]

The problem is that 2/3 of Americans are fat and in poor health. The worst in the world.

Those of us in healthcare get used to working with that population, and forget how to work with the other 1/3, who come to visit us MUCH LESS OFTEN.

It's an exposure problem. That which you are exposed to the most becomes the default.

[marni]

[ I think I'm getting overly sensitive in my old age; I don't like it when I get "compliments" regarding the shape I am in (most of the time said in a tone, like "good job, how do you do it, because I can't") or, more recently, I'm spoken to like I am an idiot, which tends to occur when a medical person sees my actual birthday and they know how old I am.)

What particularly irks me is being called "young lady" and " sweetie " by all those who cannot be bothered to remember or use my first name. This seems to happen particularly when I am getting mammograms, and as for the week I spent in the hospital getting x rayed 2x a day for a lung collapsed by a bike accident. Why at 6 am and 11 pm at night? They'd finish and then I would sit around in a wheel chair in an empty corridor for an hour or so before they remembered where they had left me. And all the time with the sympathetic pats and the "sweeties, honeys and young ladies."

My mother used to give verbal SWAC (Swat you with a cane) awards to people who treated her patronizingly or like she was an idiot.

[PamNY]

I think I'm getting overly sensitive in my old age; I don't like it when I get "compliments" regarding the shape I am in (most of the time said in a tone, like "good job, how do you do it, because I can't") or, more recently, I'm spoken to like I am an idiot, which tends to occur when a medical person sees my actual birthday and they know how old I am. But that's another issue.
It's not that I don't like compliments, but it feels sort of back handed to me.

For years, I had every intention of becoming livid the first time someone referred to me as "spry." I don't think people use that word much anymore, but there will be an equivalent.

More and more comments seem patronizing as I become older. Alas, I probably sounded that way myself when I was younger. One of my dearest friends was my parents' age and I cringe to think what I may have said to her through the years. But you know, she was the only grey-haired person at the rock concert. She was more adventurous and fun than a lot of my same-age friends. And I may have pointed this out in ways that sounded patronizing.

My hope is that she understood, and I hope I can be understanding too.

[roadie gal]

In my town, which has a very high percentage of very healthy, fit people, the paramedics had to buy all new guerneys that would hold people up to 500 pounds. The old ones were rated to 350 lbs.

The table for the CT scan had to be upgraded to a 500 lb load as well.

In the ER we were going to get the 500 lb guerneys, but they didn't fit through the doorways (as someone has already mentioned). They had to replace the chairs in the waiting room to make them all bigger. And all of our wheelchairs are supersized as well.

It's rediculous.

[Becky]

I just want to know where I can buy my own hospital gown that fits me. I would bring my own to my doc appointments and physicals if it meant not drowning in something "one size fits all".

[Crankin]

Thank you, Roadie Gal and Knott. I know that you are both in the medical field. It's true, we are not used to seeing people who are at least healthy "looking," but I would hope to be treated as an intelligent person who is invested in my health, unless I show them otherwise!
I keep thinking that if I talked to my clients the way I have been talked to, I wouldn't last very long. Sure, a lot of them don't comply with the things we discuss in session all of the time, but, that is why they are seeing me.
And don't get me started on the new pcp I saw last week. I decided to give her a chance, after seeing her for a sinus infection. She just had no clue as to how to talk to an older person who leads an active lifestyle, so I will be looking for someone else.

[Jolt]

Thank you, Roadie Gal and Knott. I know that you are both in the medical field. It's true, we are not used to seeing people who are at least healthy "looking," but I would hope to be treated as an intelligent person who is invested in my health, unless I show them otherwise!

That's just it...isn't it better to talk to one's patients assuming they are intelligent and can understand their condition/treatment/tests/etc., rather than assuming right off that such isn't the case? Treating someone like an idiot is not a good way to start the interaction and will only make that patient not want to take your advice!

[KnottedYet]

I don't think any of us are deliberately treating our patients like "idiots."

We do not assume all patients are unintelligent.

I think this is a conversation you need to be having with the person you feel insulted you.

[Crankin]

Knott, I did try to have the conversation with my new pcp, in the context of my physical. I told her that I want her to be a partner with me in my health care and I explained everything I do in terms of my lifestyle, so she would understand that I am not a sedentary 57 year old. After she told me she should use my cholesterol ratio as a case study and asked me what my secret was (ah, riding my bike 3,227 miles last year and eating well), she went and continued to speak to me as if I was 10 years old. Then she went and forgot to give me some paperwork I needed and faxed my prescription to the wrong pharmacy, after I showed her on her computer where to send it to. I feel like I am dealing with a bunch of ADD people, I have to keep on track, because every doctor in this practice does this.
Jolt, you hit the nail on the head. My clients are struggling with all kinds of issues, poverty being one in many of the cases, in addition to mental illness. I don't dumb down anything and I have been pleasantly surprised at their openness and facility to articulate the issues. If someone doesn't seem to understand something, I explain it, but not like I'm explaining it to a 3 year old.

[Miranda]

Yep, I'm in the worked in healthcare crew as well. Agree with what's been said. Some peeps just don't need to be in the biz anymore lol. Sorry things haven't been going so well. I know switching docs is a PITA, but do you have another option? Insurance constraints can just sux I understand first hand. Hmm, maybe next time you say, "I'm here to see Santa because I want a new bici for xmas... but you look like the Easter Bunny... am I in the wrong place then?". Stupid is as stupid does, Forrest dhrrr. (((hugs))) Hope you get your doc worked out at least.

[JennK13]

I know what you're talking about, Crankin. Everytime I go for PT, my therapist is amazed that 1) I can explain where my pain is coming from and what makes it feel better or worse; 2) that I understand the exercises he gives me, and 3) that I'm actually able to do the exercises - apparently the general public doesn't have the flexibility or core strength that I have (and I'm not even in the middle of training yet!)

My chiropractor is amazed at my body awareness, as is my PCP. None of these three talk to me like I'm a moron - it's more like a relief to them. Not to say I haven't had a bad doctor; I've ended up in the ER because of a doctor who dismissed patients (she told me I was crazy and to stop doing research online - only to find after switching doctors that I DO have an autoimmune disease like I feared!)

I think it has to do with the obesity epidemic in our country, and a lack of people who are proactive in their personal health and well being. It's one thing if you're in a busy ER or urgent care; but when you're in a clinic for a PT exam, I wouldn't expect to be treated like I'm in pain or drugged to a point where I'm not coherent.

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

That's interesting. Every year i go for my gynocology checkup and Pap test and sit in the waiting room there at the women's clinic in the hospital.
This year I noticed they had new chairs in the waiting room...and fully half of the new chairs were 'semi-loveseats'. But the 'loveseats' were just a little too small to fit two people comfortably. i had never seen chairs sized like that before, and it took me a second to realize the reason for them.

[Crankin]

Miranda, I almost spit out my oatmeal reading your post.
I can change my pcp any time I want... I have great insurance. My closest friend works in development at the hospital and told me about a new woman who is establishing a practice in the next town. I was going to call her to set up a physical when i got sick and went to my practice, where the original doctor's wife had joined recently. I saw her and she kind of guilted me into making an appt. for a physical before I knew it. I decided to give them one more chance and they "failed" their exam. She even tried to get me to have my pap, etc. done there, which I am not opposed to, but I so enjoy seeing my gyn, because she is a tri-athlete, who lost 150 lbs. and we used to see each other, for years at the health club, at 5:30 AM. She understands my lifestyle (and why I come in every spring with some type of "issue" from lots of riding).

[yellow]

If y'all haven't read it, pick up "How Doctors Think" by Jerome Groopman.

Over the last 3 years I have really changed how I think about medical care. I think I've had good, thoughtful care. But the obvious human limitations have been, at times, staggering. As a friend of mine who is an ER doc put it, there's more "art" to it than we think (and some docs are better at the art part than others) and often our expectations as patients are not in line with reality (whether that reality is uncertainty on the doc's part, an insurance limitation, or a false belief we might hold). I know I certainly had this problem; in fact I still struggle with understanding just exactly what appropriate expectations should be. The more I think about it, the more confused I get.

Anyway, the book is a good read