Quote Originally Posted by Crankin View Post
I think, generally, if you lead a lifestyle that is any little bit non-conventional, many people think you are immature or just plain weird. I may have the house in a nice suburb, etc., but I did it all in a somewhat unconventional way. I got married after knowing my DH for 6 months, I've had lots of jobs, and we moved across the country, giving up 2 good jobs and a beautiful house because we wanted our kids to have a certain lifestyle/cultural values. Did people have trouble with this? Oh yeah. And DH being a house husband while I worked? Not too common in 1982/3.
Yes, that's true, and it cuts across all age lines, really. My brother is in his mid 40s, a surfer, artist, and comic store owner. He's intelligent, funny as h-e-l-l, and culturally aware. He's also single (one early marriage) with no kids. He would LOVE to fall in love and be in a committed relationship again, but women he meets in their 30s and 40s find him too unconventional and too poor. I'm sure some would call him immature simply because of the life he lives and because he dresses like a surfer/skater instead of a middle-aged man. They want more conventional men who drive nicer cars and bring home steadier paychecks. And he has a hard time relating intellectually to the women in their 20s who do find him and his alternative lifestyle exciting. I worry that he'll never find love again because of the disconnect between his lifestyle and age. It's too bad because he's no selfish Peter Pan. He surfs for the love of it and the exilaration it brings him, not to have a "cut" body. I know he's lonely, though.

And I too know that people think my DH and I are weird, especially because we live in the conservative/traditional southeast. We don't have children. He's a house-husband (after getting laid off in the telecom bust), I support him. He volunteers for Habitat and takes care of our dog, does the shopping, etc. We moved from our nice house in the country to a small apartment and sold one of our two cars, so my DH gets around by foot, bike, and bus. I drive as little as possible, and we walk or take the bus places most people of our ages and income would only drive. We've moved a lot, including two moves out of and back to NC, leaving and coming back to the same jobs! And now we're trumping all our previous adventures by buying a condo in Belize.

But you know, the older I get, the more I relish being different! People can think what they want to, but I love not living a "typical" upper-middle class existence in the suburbs, keeping up a lawn, and spending the weekends maintaining the yard. Been there, done that, don't miss it a bit. I'd much rather be out riding my bike or walking somewhere. I love not feeling any compunction to "keep up with the Joneses", as I did in my 20s and 30s. If there's one really good thing about aging, it's just this. Being comfortable in one's own skin and finally figuring out who you are and what matters to you. Some people seem to figure that out relatively young; some of us take a bit longer. But when you do hit upon it and realize "this is the life I was meant to live; this is me", it feels really, really good.

Sorry for the ramble!