You know, it might just be the different school environments, too. Every classroom in our school starts every day with appreciations from student to student in what they call Morning Meeting. Teachers reinforce good behavior with vocal appreciations of kids doing the right thing. (I do it in the library, too: "I really appreciate Kara and Michael for sitting down so quickly and quietly in the Story Circle. Thank you, Casey and Alana and Carrie for joining them." Sounds cheesy, I know, but it works.)

We have a big schoolwide Gratitude Celebration at Thanksgiving. We start every faculty meeting with appreciations, too, teacher to teacher. Even our parent council starts their meetings with appreciations. And by that, I mean each person in the circle is invited (not obligated) to share something nice that they noticed someone else doing since they met last, and it can be big or small, but it lets people know that their kindnesses are noticed. It also feels good to be the person calling attention to someone else's good work.

Gifts attached to those messages of appreciation are just tangible recognition of a job well done or someone going out of their way to be kind or helpful.

Not at all an obligation, but very much appreciated.

Now, gifts for family...those often feel like an obligation to me. What is it about sharing a gene pool with someone that seems to make cattiness and sniping okay?

Roxy