Ladyjai,

After reading your post i can identify with what you're saying. I've always been big and never been able to see the beauty in my body. Prior to purchasing a bike, i was a size 16 almost 18 (that's nz/oz sizes which are a bit diff to the us) and wondered if i'd ever get rid of some of the bigger bits.
I ate & had a hard time controlling my weight. I found out later that my hypothyroid didn't help and needed to take the medication regularly..not sporadically....

I sort of liked my body but somehow thought I needed to get rid of some of the excess to be liked more.

Well, we bought bikes & it's done so much for my confidence- body wise. I'm slowly getting there but feel much happier looking at my body than before. Ian often worries i'll go a bit nutty & try an extreme diet but i know how it would affect cycling. He's been very supportive and love the fact he tells me I have a shape.

I'm sure that you're a beautiful lady and who cares if society says we have to be a certain weight. Stuff societal norms...I may have a bigger body but I can mountain bike down freaky hills & do triathlons even with the fear of being stung by jellyfish....

c