Depression

[alexis_the_tiny]

Clockwork Orange, I don't care if its cheesy, it's awesome. Then again, I love Cornify because I can pepper my web browser with sparkly rainbows and unicorns.

I think its just not easy for people who don't have depression to understand that its bad. Mine comes layered with anxiety and sensory/modulation issues so people tend to just think I'm being intense.

Channlluv, sleep is always a problem for me due to said sensory/modulation problems. When I'm depressed, I become insomniac. On top of that, I have things like no blinky lights in the room or no lights coming through the door cracks from the outside before I can even think about falling asleep. I'm going to go see about Wellbutrin, vitamin D and sleeping pills to start dealing with things a bit. Just to make things more fun, my regular therapist is suddenly unavailable for an indefinite period of time and the next one can only see me in a month's time.

[OakLeaf]

I'm very light-sensitive too. Just as important to me as no light at night, is lots of light during the daytime. I don't know what your work situation is like, but can you get outside during your lunch break ... get a doctor slip to say you need an office with a window ... spend your weekends reading outside if you don't have the energy for anything else ... things of that nature?

[alexis_the_tiny]

So I had a total meltdown last night followed by being completely unable to get out of bed this morning. Went down to my GP for some quick rescue meds and a talk. She's not convinced of the need to have my Vitamin D levels checked at all, her reasoning being that we live in a tropical country and I'd somehow get enough sun to have decent levels of vitamin D. However, she gave me some anti depressants for the next few days until I can get a psych appointment and told me to try out taking more Vitamin B and accupuncture or yoga. And then she told me "But you're a cyclist, won't all the exercise make you feel better?"

I don't know whether to ROFLMAO or cry. I think we have a funny story of the week here....

[PamNY]

I don't know whether to ROFLMAO or cry. I think we have a funny story of the week here....

Yep, you do have a funny story there. A doctor once told me "try not to worry so much." Um, yeah, if I could do that we wouldn't be having this conversation.

I have no advice, just wanted to add good wishes and state the obvious -- things will get better, as you obviously know. I do admire you for talking about it here; reaching out for support is a sign of strength, and you may be helping somebody else by sharing your story.

Hope you get a psych appointment very soon.

[Crankin]

Alexis,
I know how frustrating it is to wait for your pysch appt./deal with the system in general, but despite the pcp's silly comments about vit D, at least you have some meds to help out.
If you want to talk more specifically, until your appt., feel free to PM me. I'm just a lowly intern therapist, but I've been treating clients for a year, so I'm willing to share ideas with you.
The suggestion about acupuncture might be something to think about. I was very hesitant to try it, but it helped me tremendously during a period of extreme anxiety. It didn't work immediately, but I did get relief during the sessions and right afterwards, and then about 2-3 weeks later, I noticed a change in my level of anxiety and my ability to just function better. I went to a traditional practitioner and I was able to negotiate the price with him. My insurance would pay if I went to an MD who was an acupuncturist.
Try to stay open to trying new modalities. You never know what might be successful for you.

[indysteel]

Alexis,

Try to stay open to trying new modalities. You never know what might be successful for you.

+1. I've had periods of episodic depression over the years and yoga has proven to be quite effective in helping me keep a check on my stress level and mood. It helps that I found a very supportive studio where I've met any number of caring and intuitive people. It's someplace where I can count on getting a hug.

I am truly sorry you're feeling low right now, but it sounds like you're well aware of the need to be proactive in dealing with it. I wish you all the best.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Thanks guys. I'm actually open to yoga, just not acupuncture because needles scare me s**tless. Maybe its just me, but I don't think regular panic attacks can do much for depression. =p Yoga, I know helps because I took yoga classes for a while and just being in the class itself was immensely helpful. Another thing I started on is supplementation, vitamin E, B complex and fish oil along with a calcium + D supplement I'm taking cautiously.

Crankin, thanks for the offer, I'll PM you soon. =)