IME, guys tend to think that women belong on WSD because they've had it beaten into their brains by the bike industry. Then again, I'm the bike industry's idea of the perfect WSD rider, and I don't particularly like most WSD frames. A good chunk of it does come down to rider preference.

You know your body better than anyone else. Based on your description of yourself and your fit issues with clothing, I wouldn't put you on a WSD unless there were other bike fit issues that necessitated it.

Do you have a bike that you've owned/ridden and liked that you can use as a starting point for geometry/measurements? I've purchased a few bikes now based primarily on what their geometry charts said and the geometry charts of other bikes that I'd ridden, and done pretty well fit-wise. The Salsa was one of those purchases. As a caveat, this approach doesn't work for everyone....

Good luck! It's certainly a tough spot to be in...