depression

[blackhillsbiker]

clinical genetic depression was the dirty little secret in our family and I dealt with it for years before finally seeking the help I needed.her.

I could have written that. I've done therapy, medication, and a combination of the 2 during different episodes in my life. Medication literally saved my life at one point. I'm glad she has a friend like you.

Deb

[alexis_the_tiny]

Its terrific that your friend has you trying to help her. Don't give yourself grief if you don't see her depression. I've been disgnosed with low level depression and anxiety, generally, the worse I feel, the happier and more competent I'll become on the outside until I reach a breaking point.

She doesn't necessarily have to take medication although it can be helpful as a 'rescue' option. A good psychiatrist will find out what she's comfortable with before offering her options unless she really needs the meds for her own safety. What really works is to find a therapist she can 'click' with and attending therapy religiously. It may not seem to work for anything from the first month to a bunch of years- I quit therapy many times in the early days because it felt futile, but sticking to it will pay off eventually.

There's an article somewhere that recommends people with depression get lots of sunlight, exercise, sleep (8 hours or more), Omega-3 fatty acids and antioxidants, plus social interaction as a cure. I have my reservations when anyone mentions a 'cure' for depression but considering that they all seem like a common sense way to improve quality of life, it won't be much harm to start trying any of them. If it can help to control the depression, awesome, if not, well, at least her lifestyle is healthier.

Lastly, if her partner might be a factor in her depression, she should consider a therapist who is able to work with couples or asking her therapist to recommend one. If I'm in a serious relationship, my therapist will, at some point, ask me to bring my partner in for a session even if things are ok because a big part of my depression/anxiety stems from an inability to express my needs and worries to anyone. Couples therapy might help them work out what might be her triggers and how to cope.

Good luck to your friend! =)

[redrhodie]

Thank you. She's still not gone for counseling, yet. Another member of our team is also having depression issues, and she's actively seeking help. My friend is waiting for her to find a therapist she likes. She (this other person) went to a clinic this week, and it wasn't a good fit, so the search is still on. I'm not sure this is the best way for my friend to get help, since they have very different issues, but that's what's happening.

Her relationship seems to be a huge factor in her depression. I don't think they're "together" enough for him to go to counseling with her, not that he would have ever been open to that. I think she'll have to do this on her own, and that's probably what deep inside she knows, and why she is procrastinating.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Its ok, just keep prodding her on to find a therapist at occasional intervals. Somehow, I find that I'm a BIG TIME procrastinator when in the middle of a very depressive period. It might be what's happening with her.

A good therapist will not prod her to any realizations or make her make any decisions regarding the relationship while she is not ready. Instead, its simply a safe place for her to vent until she decides for herself what to do about it. A good therapist knows that you can't force anyone regarding decisions about relationships. If your friend is procrastinating because of that, let her know that a therapist won't force any conclusions on her and keep encouraging her to seek help. =)

[stella2]

I agree with all the great suggestions above. I work in mental health in the UK and I have heard surprisingly good things from colleagues and patients about Mind Gym. It's a online resource programme of CBT for Depression. Folk can work through it at their own pace and it's free!

http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome

[hirakukibou]

I have dealt with depression much of my life and was profiled in Psychology Today last year:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/artic...ning-heartache

It is a tough illness and I think one that need to be approached in a multifaceted way. In my experience, there is no quick fix. I also know that my friends are critical to my mental health and the ones where I can be real, even if I am depressed, without judgment or attempts to fix me, are the ones to whom I am closest.

(I also write about this in my blog.)

[Gowest]

You are a wonderful friend - remember to be patient - when you are depressed you have blinders on and can't see what others see. It may take many false starts on her part - but be consistent and listen. What appears obvious to you is not at all obvious to her - even if she can rationalize it - doesn't mean it is so easy to do.

also - it can take a while to find the right match with a therapist - this is ok - what works for one does not work for another.

try to help her understand she is not alone - this video is EXCELLENT - it is used at some of the top institutions in the country for treating mental illness:

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/takeonestep/depression/

she can view it in the privacy of her home and on her terms. It shows the stories of real people who have battled depression from CEO's to houswives and students.

You are a dear to be so concerned - don't give up on her - she is moving in the right direction.