Welcome back milkbone. Sorry to hear that things have been rough for you, but glad that life seems to be looking up.

+1 on not worrying about the numbers - including worrying about whether you are ever going to "improve" from where you are now. "Improvement" can take a lot of forms, and not all of them can be measured with gadgets. And even if you can get past beating yourself up (which I sure hope you do), why turn cycling into a chore that you have to do just so you can see a "better" number on your computer?

Ride for the joy of it. Ride for the feel of the wind on your skin, the smell of the air, the sound of your tires.