Is this bad?

[Owlie]

Is this fantasy bike something that already exists, or would it be custom or something you were hoping to wonderfully, magically, find?

It does sound beautiful.

Now you have to envision yourself dressed like Miss Marple riding through town.

I think it'll have to be custom. While I'm sure there's a Raleigh out there that meets some of my specs, I'd probably be in horrible pain if I tried to ride it! Though if I can find a steel touring frame that fits, I may well just have it powdercoated.