How Hard Can It Be? Year 3

[Veronica]

My overuse injury from 2007 has returned. I'd like to blame it on my body just being genetically wrong - hammer toes and bunions, hugely overpronated...

But really, it's my lack of training. It was the same thing in 2007. Sure I can do a double century when my longest ride in the last 3 months was fifty miles...

I do mental toughness during the event very well. In the months leading up to it... not so much. Being incredibly introspective, too much so sometimes, I wonder, "What's the deal?"

I know I can blame some of it on not wanting to train in the wind, rain and cold. That stuff I can make myself suck up and just do. I've got the clothes and really it's not so bad once you're out doing it.

But how many days have I come home just mentally and emotionally drained from work? Why do I let the kids who just want to be lumps get to me so much? How many days did I just go home and sleep because I was worn out from the frustration. Even now as I look around my room at the kids who should be silently reading and aren't, I wonder why do I care so much. Why do I get so emotionally invested that I lose sight of what I want to do, what my personal priorities are?

I wonder how the other teachers who training for even bigger races stay focused?

The mental toughness I need to cultivate is to not get so involved, to not carry that frustration around with me all day, to not let it sap all the life out of me.

Okay, back to work.

Veronica

[rocknrollgirl]

Hey V,
I have been teaching HS for 22 years, and I used to be in the same exact boat. Then about 6 years ago, I got very ill and required emergency surgery about 1 month prior to the AP Bio exam. I was completely freaked out and rushed to try and get back to school. In the end, the kids that were destined to do well did well, and the slackers...well they did not.

I learned from this experience, that my students need to be actively engaged in their education too. I still give them 110% while I am in the building, from
6:30 am to 3pm, but I carry less of their "stuff" home with me. That is not to say that I do not have days where I am in tears after a parent phone call, or frustrated beyond belief. I have just gotten better at compartmentalizing.

Now I leave and go train at the end of the day and vent it out that way.

I am not sure how long you have been teaching, but it may get better. The weird thing is, as I let go, I think I am actually more compassionate and caring than I was before. Old age I guess.

[Veronica]

Thanks RnR! I've been teaching 19 years.

Veronica

[maillotpois]

Just speaking here as a mom first and as your friend second: thank you for caring enough to internalize your worries and concerns about your class BUT you can't take care of your class if you don't first and foremost take care of yourself and listen to your needs and your limits. So worry about you first and them second.

[rocknrollgirl]

Thanks RnR! I've been teaching 19 years.

Veronica

I can tell from your posts that you teach younger students, I am sure that makes it harder to separate yourself from them. They are lucky to have you, but you do need to save some time to refill your cup.

Just like on an airplane, put your own mask on first and THEN help those around you.