Sorry about your cat. And, don't beat yourself up about letting her out. I used to feel really badly when my cat was hanging around the front door, looking out. I did let her out at times.
We had our cat for 14 years; had to put her down 2 years ago. I still think she will be greeting me when I come home. What helps me is that both of my grown sons have a cat now, and both talk about their cats like they are talking about their kids! We really don't want the responsibility of another pet, but she got me to even "warm up" to the idea of having a pet, which was a huge thing for me.



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I wouldn't have an outdoor cat where I live now...too many cars etc. but, I'm sure your cat loved being able to be outside rather than sit in a window daydreaming of the "serengetti" world that was just on the other side of the glass
