Have you taken the bicycle class, Traffic Skills 101, that the Bike League offers? Look at http://www.bikeleague.org to find classes offered in your area.

Knowing how to ride safely in traffic will expand your options. There will still be roads that you don't want to ride on, but having this knowledge, confidence and experience will open up so many roads to you. I know a guy who had biked in traffic for 20+ years, who said after he took that class that there were roads he used to avoid, which now he bikes on.