I think you're missing two very good choices by skipping Trek and Specialized. Both have bikes for just what your looking for - the Ruby and the Madone. Lots of people seem to have issues with buying from a big company like Trek, but at the end of the day, they make great bikes.
I'm 44 and bought a Trek Madone 4.5 and love it. I looked at every possibility of bikes that were stocked in my size in my LBSs. I couldn't justify the price difference, but the Madone 5 series is really nice. The Ruby had an awesome ride (very smooth), but didn't fit as well. I came close to buying a Scott Contessa CR1, but it wasn't nearly as smooth as the Trek and didn't fit quite as well, though had full Ultegra. I think Scott has since come out with a less racy, more comfortable, CR1.
Also, Scott's women's bikes have the same exact geometry as its mens bikes (you can check the website). So, the Contessa CR1s have shorter reach brake levers, different seats and drop bars, etc, but no significant fit differences (except for a shorter stem). If the bike fit me, I wouldn't care, but at the same time, Scott does not seem to put the same effort into the technology of its women's bikes as the other brands.



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