I think the roommate idea is a good one. Don't feel guilty for using your student loans for living expenses that's why the government allows for that. Honestly it sounds like the depression that your mother is feeling over your father's passing is creeping into you. I can completely understand needing to distance myself from that. I'm sure you are sad too and seeing her sit and watch TV all day isn't helping you. You are telling us what helps you, going out and interacting with the world and people your age. There is no crime in that. Best of luck to you.