Taking a break for awhile...(warning: long and sad)

[Trek420]

emily_in_nc wrote,

"I am 44 years old, older than a lot of people who lose their first parent, but I think until you do lose one of your parents, you live in sort of a bubble. When that bubble bursts, you are forced to grow up in a most difficult way."

I forget where I read this but someone wrote on the death of a parent that "She stood between me and death". At least that's been my feeling.

"I wish I could feel my dad's presence, as some of you mention. I have hoped to dream about him, maybe receive some sort of sign that he is "ok", but I haven't"

I don't think you can rush this. My best friend said that in her culture (her Dad's Carribean) these dreams are considered very favorable, like a visit from the deceased.

Mostly I find myself talking to him sometimes. Those WWJD lanyads, t-shirts and coffee cups? What Would Jack Do, what would my Dad say?

And when I'm with family and friends we share memories of Dad.

"I'm not a traditionally religious person, but I have always believed that our souls live on after death. My dad had the mind of a scientist and didn't believe that. He believed that the light just turned off. I find that thought just unbearable, but I also find myself wondering if he was right after all."

I'm honestly not sure my Dads thoughts of the afterlife, I think he had some chats with my brother about that. He was the son of a deeply religious man but he didn't follow traditional religion himself. I would say that anyone who met him, he followed the golden rule and cared deeply about his family and others.

I think the closest he got to church was outdoors in the garden.

I know your Dad would want you most of all to be happy, and for you to be well.

How did he react to your crash? Supportive of your recovery? Did he want you off the road? Or was he, like us, your cheering section? Take all the time you need to heal.