Dear work MGMT,

Whatever died in our office ceiling over the weekend - WONT GO AWAY! Its dead, it smells - why wont you send someone to fetch it?
I had to clean up blood, from that poor lady that fell down the escalator, BECAUSE SOMEONE LEFT IT ALL OVER FLOOR, smearing it with paper towels and hiding it with a fixture - ewwww!! I cleaned it up and I am not mgmt and not first aid!

Im not going up there and getting it out and if I have to, Im leaving it in the MGMT OFFICE!!!
I MEAN IT.
I love you guys but you suck.

signed disgruntled co worker