nanci... yikes, that is scary...

anytime someone threatens your safety you will no doubt feel violated whether they actually hurt you or not. yes, you should look into gettting pepper spray and carrying it. Just make sure you understand the laws in your area for it... you can use it for self defense, anytime you fear for your safety... not your life, your safety. I am divorced from a cop and still with the dept myself in a volunteer capacity so pretty familiar with it's usage etc. You should be able to buy the same spray that officers carry...most likely at a gun shop. Get the larger sized can and replace it yearly. Out here it costs $14. When you buy it ask the shop owners about it's usage, safety etc. My ex was insistent that I take the first can out back and spray it so I would understand EXACTLY how it works... how far it sprays and how wide a path... a very good idea.

I still carry it if I ride alone especially. And I have a can in my vehicle... WHEN I feel threatened I take it out and make sure the threatening person knows that I have it... if they mean no harm and they're offended, tough luck. I go with my gut instinct.

I'm sure the BF doesn't fear for his safety the same way you fear for yours. And you would legally be able to use pepper spray in some instances where he might not... if a guy who's 5'9" and 170lbs makes a grab for you, you could certainly say you feared for your safety after hosing him down with spray... the BF most likely wouldn't be able to use that same defense...

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences... I've had ONE where I had my can up at spray level and actually confronted a guy. I was out walking and told the guy if he didn't get the F away from me I was going to spray the entire can on him... he just stood there with a weird half smile... never said a word. I am 100% sure that the can of pepper spray helped insure my safety that day.

and remember, it is meant to give you a short head start... from there, you need to scream your head off and attract attention!!!

I have never considered carrying a gun as I am not proficient enough to be safe with it... I can't imagine if I shot at someone and hurt someone else accidentally... if you do consider that route, PLEASE take safety classes and keep current by practicing at the range... hugs...