Quote Originally Posted by Catriona View Post
So not asking why someone died on my part is mostly a - okay, someone's intimate medical details are not my business unless they volunteer it, and that's just often times a painful topic... I just find it's better to let people talk, because people do want to talk about their deceased love one...
All true. I never meant to imply that one should ask such questions. I just meant to explain that it's somewhat human to do so. My point was, "Here is why some of us can appear insensitive when we really just care," and was definitely not, "We should all be insensitive to prove we care."

I agree that the alternatives given in many posts here (primarily simply offering condolences) are what we should all aspire for.