Yes, you should never ask unless you are person who is entitled to know (that would vary depending on the relationships involved). Offer your condolences.

However, there is a stigma attached to suicide, and I have observed it demonstrated in some of these posts. I'm very sorry for you if suicide has touched your life. There is no shame in the fact that someone you love was ill enough to commit suicide. The stigma, in fact, contributes to the incidence of suicide. If those who are suicidally depressed were able to know they weren't alone, maybe there would be less suicide. It is the fifth leading cause of death among 18-65 year olds! We shouldn't punish the families of those who have done it, and make them feel as if it should be a secret.

This is no comment on the cause of death of shootingstar's relative's cause of death.

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, outofthedarkness.org, if you want to learn more.

Karen