hammer... here' s what I recommend to EVERYONE who is buying a bike... test ride every single bike you can get you hands on... when you ride the one that feels right, THAT is your bike!
I desperately wanted the Trek Project One bike a few years ago. It just did NOT fit my body. WSD does not work for me either since I have a longer than normal torso for a chick... sigh...
so I rode Trek, Giant, Specialized, Lemond, De Rosa, and then I decided to ride this Litespeed that was in a shop... I did 2 laps around a parking lot and that was it. I knew I found my bike. Not one single regret since buying it!
I say get the best frame you can for the $$$... components can be upgraded. I have never heard of someone cracking their CF frame with normal riding... yeah, if you crash, hard, you could break the bike. But if you crash THAT hard the bike will no doubt be the least of your concerns.
As to components, I can tell a big difference between 105 and Ultegra. The only difference I can tell between Ultegra and DuraAce is in the shifters (DA is a little smoother) and the massive price difference (DA is WAY more expensive)... but you should ride all of them and then decide what you need.
To me, buying a bike is like buying a car. You have to test drive as many as you can to be sure you get the one that is best for you... and at the price of bikes, it's an investment too... so ride a bunch!!! Good luck with it...
There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".