biking partners

[Zen]

Listen to Knott.
Knott is wise.

I'm having that printed on a tee shirt.

[Ann G]

I'm with the rest on this. It seems that you want more from a relationship than guy #1 is willing to give. Seeing guy #2 is not cheating on guy #1. Give guy #2 a chance, and try that kiss assessment idea.

[Mr. Bloom]

Don't place a loyalty standard on yourself that is greater than the one being offered by Guy #1. He's not seeking anything else, so you're meeting a convenient need. By the same token, don't get yourself in an unfulfilling lapdog relationship with Guy #2...that could be equally unsatisfying.

I guess you really have to ask yourself whether you would be happy if the status quo with #1 was maintained for another 5 years? 10 years? Is this what you want or will you be feeling that your commitment is a bit unrequited by then?

I agree with everything Knott said (except the kiss)

[kenyonchris]

You guys are great. I had a serious talk with guy #1 today, he was honestly upset that I would miss out on something fun because of him, and I get the feeling he is backing off because he wants me to get out there. He is really a great, great guy who has had bad relationships. I guess I am going to read the writing on the wall, no matter how much I would like it to say something else.
It makes me sad, I adore him.

Guy #2 is very attentive (almost too attentive). But I am keeping it as low key and slow as possible so that I can really get a feel for it, and I don't have any desire to jump from one serious relationship to another.

THANK YOU to everyone who has chimed or will chime in. This is really hard, and you guys make it better.