Is "insanity" a valid answer?

I think sometimes it's the feeling and memory of crossing the finish line. Seeing people that have accomplished something that's important to them in what's probably an entirely unique way - for some it's a triumph to finish, for others it's a PR, for everyone it's the courage to train and race at all.

It's also something, one of the few things, that I do solely for myself. I can focus on something but still use the mental skills I'm good at - adapting, sorting my way through a lot of inputs at a time, that sort of thing. Sometimes it's nice to do something for yourself and feel like you get a reward for doing so in many ways.

And, sometimes, it's nice to feel like I'm good at something, even if I'm not "the best" I like to see myself improve and be "better than average" or "not last" or "finished", whatever the priority is. Small victories.