I say... let her wear it!

OK, this is from the mother of a ToyBoy (11yo now). And from a former, and still am to a degree, ToyBoy mom.... plus one with a BGF whose DS wears a dress!

If and when peeps go to comment on her outfit, just smile and say loud & proud, "...DD picked this outfit out herself... she's so proud of it!...".

I mean, what are they gonna do? Beat up on a sweet little girl whose proud of her decisions? Beat up on a mom whose confident enough in the "big picture of life" to love her child regardless of society's norms and appearances? IF someone does... umm, their op is not worth hearing anyway imho.

Any teacher my kids have had, that has been worth anything, knows about the gender identification issues children go through in development. I think the point of the note is that they want the children dressed nicely. But to me, I don't know that I really like that as a mom either.

What if the family did not have $ to buy dressy clothes?

My inlaws are traditional in their beliefs and church. DD going to church with them has always been a freakin nightmare. I got to the point where I'd tell my DMIL to buy a dress, store it at her house, and put it on DD (& be the one to struggle with her) when she took her to church. Or sometimes they'd end up staying home from church over the fight and tears that went with the dress and tights. Like that was what God really wanted. Sorry... getting off my soap box there.

But, my point in that is the same about your DD boy suit.

On the teasing... we had a shrink give this advice once...

Just let the kid wear the whatever to school etc. If two different colored shoes are "in". Then fine. If another peer makes fun of the shoes being diff, then that will be the end of it. My op is that if the *worst* thing my kid does is wear clothing that is outta the society norm, die their hair purple, or whatever the like... I will have parenting life kicked in the azz. Versus kid being in jail, drug rehab, etc.

Maybe you should get DD a lapel corsage for the occasion? If I was going, I'd buy it for her as a present.

Good Luck!