Someone may have already said this, but we're just saying that hair color is "emblematic" of the whole appearance issue. It's just shorthand for the self-expression that Flybye described so eloquently.

You have the advantage of choice in this situation. If freedom of expression is that important to you that you would not consider changing your hair color - then be happy with that but know that there are consequences to the choice. One of those might be unemployment. Is that unemployment worth leaving the country and your family? Consider too, whether leaving will be to your advantage or to your disadvantage. I would think, and this is just an assumption, that you would be at an even greater disadvantage to finding work in another country.
And I just want to say one more thing.

"YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!"

Karen