I went to UNC in the early '80s, and Greek life was very big -- 15-20% of the student body, and much higher in the part of campus I lived in. I was a Pi Beta Phi legacy, but my father refused to pay for me to pledge. Even though he had been a Kappa Alpha in college at NCSU himself, by the time I was in school, he felt that the Greek system was too elitist, so he was adamantly against it. His other big objection was that it was quite expensive to pledge and join a sorority, even without living in house (I was a dorm rat for all four years), and I had two siblings following close behind me to go to college on his nickel.

I was very pissed at him about this and wished I could have afforded to pay my own way as I really wanted to try Greek life. I got over it over time, but reading this thread has brought back some kind of uncomfortable memories and feelings for me. I remember feeling like I didn't fit in and didn't have any friends, since nearly all the girls around me in my dorm were rushing and ended up pledging. I felt very left out and excluded.

I'm not sure how I feel about it all now. I don't have children so have not had to think about this in a long time, since I'm in my 40s now. I do think that if I had pledged a sorority, I might still have some friends from college. As it is now, I didn't keep up with any of my college friends. I dated one guy all the way through my years at UNC, and once we broke up, I pretty much left my college friendships behind.

Yeah, I'm kinda disappointed about what could have been. I think I missed out on some potentially rewarding female friendships.