Best Bike Buying Advice, EVER!

[Biciclista]

Me too! I had to walk through the streets of Newark, NJ and since my mother couldn't afford to buy me my own house key, I had to climb into the house through a window.
We did walk to school up and down hilly streets in the snow, but I confess that I did wear shoes in the snow.

[Possegal]

Oh yeah, well I carried my tuba up hills both ways in the snow with no shoes on.

[uforgot]

I had to climb into the house through a window.

And you had to climb in and out at, oh, say, 1am? 2am?

[OakLeaf]

Dang Zen, your school must have been on one of those roads we ride on...

[batsheva]

congratulations ladies--

this series of posts, well meaning or not, has obviously upset one of our sisters enough that she feels she doesn;t want to be on this forum anymore-- I was appalled at the comments directed at her when I read it all. the whole 'conversation' - irrelevant of who was in the right or wrong - doesn;t make me very proud of being a part of this forum right now.. we're here to support each other, not criticize and make personal remarks.

perhaps I will get some of the negative comments now, for saying this, but all of us have sent emails or made remarks that were miscontrued by others in our time and i for one, no doubt, will do so again in the future. i can only hope i will be met with more understanding than smurf, when that inevitably happens..

batsheva

[Veronica]

Wait, what about all those people who were or have been offended by Smurf's posts? I guess their feelings don't count because they didn't decide to announce they were leaving. They decided to suck up their bad feelings, realized that this is the Internet and some things get lost in translation and moved on.

I think people were trying to be supportive in a very direct way. If you ask for advice, you're going to get it here and you may not always like it. I know that some of the comments made in some of my threads about my difficult class have really p!ssed me off. Too bad for me. If I don't like the comments, I don't have to read them.

Veronica

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

Batsheva,
I think this forum is wonderfully supportive and positive towards women. Which is exactly why so many were appalled by the message and intent presented in the original post. Many of us found it to be strongly derogatory and insulting towards older women. I feel that most all of the responses were actually constructive attempts to point out why this kind of message is simply not acceptable to us as active, accepting, thoughtful, and supportive women. Yet instead of any sincerity and reflection, I have seen only defensive posturing and excuse making in return. Well, if you throw out negative attitudes, you can't expect no one to respond.
Sorry, but I think that respect for, and the feelings of, at least half the women on TE counts for something. Frankly, I would have felt ashamed for us all if no one reacted strongly to the original post. Overall, I think there are valuable attitudes and experiences to be absorbed by all of us from this thread and the subsequent thread about how our perceived appearance effects our sense of self worth. I would be willing to bet that there have been many women helped by this self reflection. That includes myself. I have read some profound and inspiring accounts from many women on this and the other thread. We can all benefit from thinking about our attitudes, no matter how young or old we are. We can all learn from each other as we go through life.

[Aggie_Ama]

I am sorry Smurf felt she had to go but the post that started this was a loaded gun. I hope she finds what she is looking for in a bike and hope it is everything she wants. Some of the advice in this thread was a bit judgmental/pointed but I honestly thought even if it was harsh it was meant with loving intentions. It also sparked some interesting and thought provoking debate.

Smurf herself gave me a post about my dog that I shouldn't feed her what the vet said and should take my potentially dying dog off the food he prescribed and get her on something else. I cried and agonized over who was right until my husband told me he was trusting his friend (also a vet) because he knew his education from attending school together. She meant well telling me she didn't think Science Diet was right and I know that. I didn't hold a grudge to her our the several others that agreed with her. My husband and I just made our own decision.

So yeah, people get feelings hurt. It is part of being adults. We suck it up, we say "that is their opinion and I can accept it" or we can't and remove ourselves. She has chosen to remove herself which is a choice.

[alpinerabbit]

86 posts and one member leaving over what made me grin... and click away... have you nothing better to do than get offended at something like this. People are dying out there in the world. For Goodness sake.

[lph]

I think people were trying to be supportive in a very direct way. If you ask for advice, you're going to get it here and you may not always like it.

That's true, but she wasn't asking for advice or even for comments, she was just passing on somebody elses opinion that she found amusing.

I wasn't offended so I can't say for sure, but to me some of the responses were a lot more offensively worded than the original post.

I hope you hang around Smurf, I like having you here.

[salsabike]

Wait, what about all those people who were or have been offended by Smurf's posts? I guess their feelings don't count because they didn't decide to announce they were leaving. They decided to suck up their bad feelings, realized that this is the Internet and some things get lost in translation and moved on.

Veronica

I did just read this entire thread from top to bottom. I think Veronica and BSG have this pretty much right. The OP posted something she knew might offend people. Some people got offended and said so. A couple of them said it rudely; others said it without being insulting. Quite a lot of the comments were positive.

I don't think that someone deciding to leave always and automatically equates to someone being "driven off". And actually it seems that the OP has asked for, and received, quite a lot of support on this board in other threads.

I continue to think that in general TE is far better mannered than many other bike boards. Not perfect. But pretty darn good.

[Biciclista]

Yes, I agree with Salsa and Bleek.

And NY Biker, if you want to know, send a PM to any of the people discussing that frame maker. i'm sure they'll tell you in private.

Smurf, come on back. Some of our wisdom might rub off on you.
meow!