Marriage: it isn't all roses and rainbows

[Tri Girl]

I told DH I was going to see a dr. He was very supportive. He said that if I felt that sad and needed to do it, then it's something I should do. I told him I was feeling very sad lately and that I was worried that we weren't OK. He said that we are a LONG way from the big D and that we're good. He's a man of few words, so that was actually saying A LOT. I feel better. Talking about feelings is VERY hard for me (unless it's a stranger and then it's very easy), so my even saying anything is huge. It'll all be OK.

Thanks again, guys and gals.

[teigyr]

Yay.

I am so glad you are getting help and that you told your husband. Sometimes fear is worse if you don't confront it and I am so very happy that he is supportive. Things build, especially if you just let them fester in your mind. Fester's an icky word, sorry.

I think you're brave but that goes right along with everything else you've accomplished. (((hugs)))

[Wahine]

more hugs from me.

[OakLeaf]

So glad you're taking steps and that you've been able to talk with your DH. Take good care.

[Duck on Wheels]

Well done, Tri! Worst fears confronted and the monster wasn't hiding under the bed. Tell DH that an extra hug or two per day will help keep the monsters away until your appointment ... and after for that matter. In fact, you may both become addicted to them.

[SheFly]

Ditto what others have said - very glad that you have made the appointment (and if only crazy people see "shrinks" then I think there are a lot of crazy people on this forum!). PLEASE, PLEASE keep this appointment, even if you are feeling better by then - it something very important for YOU.

Also glad that you have talked to DH, and that he has assuaged your fears about "the big D". Don't let it be the end, though.

We're all here for you! Keep us posted. You are doing all the right things.

Hugs,
SheFly

[bouncybouncy]

I told DH I was going to see a dr. He was very supportive. He said that if I felt that sad and needed to do it, then it's something I should do. I told him I was feeling very sad lately and that I was worried that we weren't OK. He said that we are a LONG way from the big D and that we're good.

That almost brought me to tears...sounds like a conversation I had with my hubby not too long ago! I proceeded to see someone and opening lines of communication with hubby little by little (baby steps!!!) and we are in such great place now...and it has only been a couple months!

Keep that appointment!!! And make a few more...one is never enough! Keep those conversations going with your hubby...regardless how "few" words there are! you are on the right path now so keep moving...

[tulip]

TriGirl, you've taken a very courageous and difficult first step; I know how hard that was for you. Take care and keep going in that direction.

[eclectic]

(((((((big hug))))))) for a strong brave woman

I am so glad you made the appointment this quickly - and I got a warm, good all over feeling when I read the post about you talking to your husband.

re crazy people see shrinks - Shrinks are medical doctors trained to treat disorders of the brain. If your thyroid quit working you would go to an internist and get medicine, if your pancreas quit working you would go on insulin. The brain and it's chemical levels are no different.

Re other people's problems - I am sorry to hear about your team teachers son I am sure that is having an effect on you too. And maybe the fact your good friend leaving her husband had a bearing on your marriage feelings (just a guess)

I was glad to hear you say "but I guess if they're the worst problems I'm facing then they're that bad" Truer words were never spoken

another ((((((((big hug))))))))

When you can't hold yourself up - let others carry you - You have many friends here on TE

[salsabike]

Honey, if only crazy people see shrinks, then the human race is crazy (which we are, a bit, just by nature). Believe me, you have lots of quite sane company out here.

You will get through this. And good for you for taking action.

[Irulan]

Conversations like these are how the supposed stigma of getting help for mental issues is erased. It's educating people that yes - it's just another possible illness or situation that can be helped with proper treatment.

That's why I am not shy about talking about my mental health. Well, I don't broadcast it from building rooftops, but I don't hide it either.

I blew up at a gal once. She came to me and was gossiping about a mutual acquaintance: do you know she's on anti-depressants and all that? OHMYGOD!!
I reamed her out. I said, do you know I take anti-depressants and will for the rest of my life? ( she didn't) If she were taking cardiac medication, would you talk about her like that? S

Now, I'm not trying to imply that OP will need medication or anything else, just try to explain that there are various shades of treatment that will help mental issues, and it's nothing to hide. As usual, I feel as eloquent as a bull in a china shop....

[crazycanuck]

I have to admit I'd be too afraid to go & see a psychologist or other metal health person. I don't like the word or even the image of "therapy'. I guess because it's an overused term in the world?
In terms of medication, if i required it for a mental health issue, ok.

Now before you jump on me, my dad has been dealing with PTSD for about 10yrs now. If it wasn't for anti depressants, very good friends & a great dr, he wouldn;t be here right now. He's decreased some of the meds but as soon as he notices a certain trigger feeling, he'll increase it a bit.

I'm in a rush & will have to describe this a bit better later on.

[solobiker]

Honey, if only crazy people see shrinks, then the human race is crazy (which we are, a bit, just by nature). Believe me, you have lots of quite sane company out here.

You will get through this. And good for you for taking action.

I have to add that I agree with this. There are a lot of people that ask for assistance. It is sometimes good to talk with people that are not close to your situation to give you a different perspective and to give you the tools you need.