Failure

[Veronica]

Yep, I'm a failure. I cannot engage several of my students. It must be me, can't be them or their parents, gotta be the teacher.

I suck big time.

[makbike]

Veronica,

Sounds like you have a tough group this year. Some parents have a hard time accepting the fact that they have failed and thus it is much easier to blame someone else for their short comings. Know that you are making a difference in the lives you touch each and every day. They may not show it at the moment by years from now they will realize they were blessed to be in your room. Treat yourself to a special outing, go shopping, ride your bike, enjoy dinner with a friend - simply get away from work for a few hours. Teaching is very rewarding and challenging but it can also suck the life out of you. Take care of yourself and know you are doing a wonderful job in your classroom. Hang in there!

[Crankin]

No you are not, Veronica. Let me tell you about Travis. He came with a reputation he deserved. His parents thought he could do no wrong. He was a 4 foot tall 6th grader who instilled fear in everyone. He could barely read and his mom would not let him be tested so he could get services. There were threats of lawsuits.
Travis was in my HR. Remember the nice morning meeting/sharing time I described? He wrecked it for everyone. Not only did I have him for HR, but also for Lang. Arts, and then, for a 9 week period for a remedial reading course I taught to a rotating group of kids. We were going to kill each other...
Eventually, the team decided that we would be better off if Travis moved out of my HR. One of the male teachers took him, although he still saw me for 90 minutes every other day for LA.
Yes, I gave up. I couldn't reach him. And there have been a few others just like him. Believe me, I tried. I mean, I was the teacher that everyone's parents wanted their kids to have. National Board certified, a mentor, blah, blah, blah. I still couldn't do anything with some of them.
Keep trying, but it is not your fault!

[redrhodie]

Can you take a sabbatical?

[salsabike]

Yeah, we do that "it must be me" thing a lot in this field.

It's hard to come up against some of the limits we have on what we can control. But...you also want to try to remind yourself that some of the seeds you've dropped onto what looks like fallow kid ground may well sprout later, even if you never get to see that. That happens, Veronica, which I know you know.

But I'm sorry for how it feels right now.

[Cataboo]

Yep, I'm a failure. I cannot enaage several of my students. It must be me, can't be them or their parents, gotta be the teacher.

I suck big time.

I suck bigger than you. I have 1 high school senior and I can't get the kid to think. Snickering nervously, that I can make him do.

I think the fact that his father wrote and did his 14 college applications for him and seems to be doing most of his eagle scout project might be part of the problem.

[crazycanuck]

V,

First off I think you're one amazing woman and not a failure. You seem to face everything that comes your way(tri's, long long UP MOUNTAIN rides to name a few)

Second, stand up and give the world the backwards victory sign.

Third-Are you able to take a sabbatical? I'm sure there's a very nice road in another state/country etc waiting for you & your bike.

Take care

C

[Flybye]

Says the Masters in School Counseling student...............have their IQ scores been checked? Has the school counselor had an opportunity to work with them? The kids that I see this semester have learned more about life than I have and I am 37. I can not see why they would be able to function in class at all given the stories that they carry around on their shoulders.
Don't give up, that is what they are banking on.

[Wahine]

((((((HUGS))))))

I couldn't do your job. I get frustrated trying to get through to some of my adult clients that at least made the first step of walking through the door.

[rocknrollgirl]

I had an email this morning from the mother of an 18 year old AP Biology student that was saddened and surprised that he failed the second marking period with a 53.

Saddened and surprised???? After the 4 emails that I send through the marking period to keep you updated on his lack of effort and the 8 zeros that he had?

Saddened and surprised by the progress report that was sent that said in danger of failing????

She wanted to know if I had a plan to help him pass the third marking period.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

And this is an 18 year old, college bound senior...

IT IS NOT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[OakLeaf]

Aw girl.

Vent here all you like, just remember it's not you. Unless you're a completely different person in your classes than you are here.

Thank you again for the work you do. Not many of us would take a job trying to teach pigs to sing. Just hang on to the memories of students who've actually made the effort to learn something from you (do you have any at all this year?).

[beccaB]

Yep, I'm a failure. I cannot engage several of my students. It must be me, can't be them or their parents, gotta be the teacher.

I suck big time.

No you don't. I don't do your job, but I am a school bus driver, so I understand. You can only do so much. Hang in there. Your job has to be the most rewarding and the most frustrating at the same time.

[bmccasland]

V - It most certainly can be the student and their parents. They need to take responsibility for their lives. You are not there to entertain the students, they are there to learn, it is their job too. They have to meet you half way, or at least somewhere in the middle. Do they expect their entire life to be delivered to them on a platter? What does your school admin have to say? I hate writing off students, having been written off myself by a teacher (I was NOT a slow reader, it was my EYES!).

Is there other help for the student (s)? What does interest them? Is there a way to tease from what does interest them into a learning situation? Once you disengage the IPOD, and cell phone?

Big Hugs to you.

[SheFly]

V - don't give up. As others here have said, this is NOT your fault, and you definitely don't suck.

I applaud all of you on the board that do the hard work of teaching today's children. I know that I could never do it, so hats off to all of you.

Hang in there - you're doing a great job.

SheFly

[Ana]

Veronica,

I am neither a teacher nor a parent but through my own life experiences, I have learned two important things regarding the alleged failure of which you speak:

1) You cannot expect something from someone who has not already demonstrated that quality or behavior. Firstly, you are setting yourself up for disappointment and secondly, it is somewhat unfair. Although there is a small difference in supporting and encouraging another person to fulfill his or her own potential, it is not prudent to expect achievements beyond that person's capability.

2) Change which we wish to see in others is impossible without the will of the individual. Even if he or she claims they want to change, the possibility will not even come about without them actually wanting to change themselves.

I hope this situation is resolved soon.