how to deal with DH...

[buddha_bellies]

Please let us know how it works out. I hope your blues are temporary and you'll feel better soon.

$200 is a lot of money to spend a month on classes. But like what's already mentioned, your mental health is important. I spend $100/ month on Hot yoga without blink an eye. But I don't buy too many clothes or make-up to save for that. It's all about budgetting.

Has your DH always been cautious with how you guys spend money? If not, it might be something else that's bothering him. Hopefully, you guys can sit down and talk about it. Let him know what's been bothering you without blaming him or the in-laws. It is important that you express how you feel and not blaming anyone. You can only jusify how you feel. Tell him that this class would help you get out of your saddness and go from there.

Maybe he wants to help. Guys wants to "fix" things and find solution. Is the weather out there good enough that maybe the two of you can do some stuff outside (biking, skiing, snowshoeing??)

[gingerale]

Do you all have the extra $200?? If so, then I would definitely tell him you need it for your mental health. You'll be a better person (emotionally AND physically) and wife because you need that outlet. If you don't have the money for it, then I can understand his worry. That's where you both need to sit down together and work out some kind of financial compromise (sell something you no longer need, cut back on other things to afford the money for this, etc.). Good luck with it all and I hope you two work it out so that you are able to take the classes.

[Crankin]

If you are working, I don't see why he should complain about the $, unless you as a couple, have made a decision to cut down on spending. I mean, if you can't afford it, you shouldn't spend it, but if it isn't going to affect you buying necessities, then I would have an honest discussion with him and tell him you are going to do it. Maybe you could cut back elsewhere?
A few years ago I signed up for personal training at my gym (700.00 for 3 months). I was working, making good money, high 5 figures. I didn't feel any need to ask for permission, even though we share our money. I wouldn't do it now, though, because even though we can live very nicely on my husband's salary, that is something that I don't have to do, even though it would be beneficial for my mental and physical health. My good friend is working with a trainer now and I really want to, but it's not going to happen.

[bouncybouncy]

Wow, thanks!!! Lots of good perspectives and "ammo" to go back to hubby with.

The money (in my mind) doesn't seem to be the issue, I think it is "what" it is spent on because I think he is upset I am spending it on something I can do on my own trainer in the spare room...BUT, I don't get the same motivation and/or "high" sorta speak as I do when I go to these classes and really push myself (I lack self-discipline).

He has himself decided not to join the gym and do weights in order to save money but on the other hand would not blink twice at purchasing the fancy-smancy phone that is coming out (iPhone like)...Me? I went with the not-so-fancy-phone with lots of rebates and not so many bells n'whistles cause it doesn't mean that much! **but I did get a new mp3 player too. So, not so much the money but where it is going! (he is an uber techy geek!)

I have been to a therapist, he was all for it aside from the expense and I feel I can eliminate that if I had more cycling. I would love to go outside but having a hard time kicking a chest cold and the temp is just too low (missed a fun mtb ride last night in order not to refill my lungs with flem ew!)

So, I think I will readjust a few things spending-wise, reinforce the idea of how good this will be for my mental health, and go to the classes. We do give ourselves an allowance that will almost cover the expenses...so I will budget my little wallet more and hopefully not have to dip into the shared money.

When all is over and I am happy and not trying to sleep in every morning he will not regret me going!

by the way...it is $200 for about 16 classes (rounding out a bit) I am also getting a discount through a team I ride with so that helps too...I can show him the REAL cost compared to MY cost!!! hehe