Thanks for all the (very thought-provoking) responses. They all kinda rang a bell with me on different levels. I don't think my male friends are trying to hit on me. I just think that as the only female of the group, they feel like they can talk to me instead of their macho brethren when they have an emotional issue at home.

I find it flattering that they would feel comfortably talking to me about it. No single person has crossed the line or done anything untoward. On the other hand, what makes it slightly overwhelming to me is how many of them had told me the exact same thing at one time or another.

It doesn't make me angry so much as disappointed. And I think my annoyance comes from the fact that so many of my ideals and ideas about people and their happy marriages have been a sham. It also puts a guilt burden on me because many of their wives have becomes friends of mine as well.

Quote Originally Posted by Flybye View Post
Developmentally speaking, if we look at adults in the age ranges 0f 35-45, adults at this stage are going through what Eric Erickson referred to as the stage of Generativity vs. Stagnation...... people in this stage of adulthood have a tendency to either become self-absorbed with personal achievements and life-style (a more stagnant approach to life) or to become more generative - individuals who seek productive work, new adventures and challenges, and setting important goals. It is a time of re-examination - a realization that the time is ripe to reach goals. There is a bit of a struggle to find the path at this stage, just as there were at other stages, such as during the grand old time of adolescents when we were struggling to find our identities in the world.
I think Flyby really hit upon it. All of this seems to be happening within a certain age range. In fact, if it wasn't so sad I'd find it rather laughable. My friends are all very good people at heart. I just hate to see them (and their SOs going through this.)

Definitely stuff to think about.

Thanks again, TE folks.