Quote Originally Posted by TrekJeni View Post
Hi Karen - I appreciate your honesty. I don't know if this was directed at me but I feel the urge to respond. My mother and I are not close. Never have been. She was in the living room with myself and my sister when I mentioned that Geoff and I were thinking about getting married. She briefly looked up from her game of Sudoku (or however you spell it) and then started filling in more boxes. Never uttered a word.

She's always been a stone when it comes to great things in life. My sister received the same treatment when she announced she was getting married six years ago. Same for when we both bought houses, graduated college and got great jobs. No "I'm proud of you", "I'm so happy", I knew you could do it", I can't wait to visit", nothing. Same thing in high school, "Mom, I think I want to be a vet, pilot, doctor, astronaut" was received with a "You're not good enough, smart enough, etc"...

Oh and I don't think I'm too young. Never been married, no kids and I'm 33. I've just ben waiting for the best! And it certainly helps he manages his fathers bike shop!!!
It was directed to the subject matter, not you, personally. I, too, agree that people should have the wedding that pleases them, not the parents. But I also think taking into consideration the feelings of others is always called for.

Some families are so dysfunctional that a small gesture like considering the others' feelings is like spitting into the sea. It won't be recognized and it won't change anything. But at least you (generic you) would know you tried.

Karen