Baby showers at work & not knowing

[Tuckervill]

So read the sub-text here..what happens in the minds of some old-school men on the potential and skills of women, as soon as woman gets pregnant.

That would be THEIR problem, not that of the pregnant woman. In the States, it is illegal to discriminate against a woman for being pregnant or being a woman who could get pregnant. How ever "old-school men" feel about it is irrelevant. Until a workplace sets a policy against baby showers and other such things at work, then people are free to think what they like. If those "old-school men" choose to ACT on those thoughts, that's another matter entirely.

Karen

[Biciclista]

I work for a large company with a 1:7 ratio of women to men. So we don't have baby showers here THANK GOODNESS. They did, however have a baby POOL for me when I had my second son. Everyone bet on when exactly my son would be born. I WON!


I don't feel the need to contribute to people's collections unless I want to.
This whole shower thing is out of control. My son's new wife had 3 bridal showers! eeek!

[Grog]

The other day I'm in line at Superstore, a big, Costco-inspired grocery store - I go there about three times a year! - and the two women ahead of me are checking out with 40 to 50 assorted 2L bottles of pop... and a 4L container of vinegar. I though it was funny so I asked what they were going to do with that, she said: "Oh, we're having a baby shower for my daughter." She proceeded to explain there would be 200 guests. I still can't wrap my head around that.

**

Baby and wedding were a very foreign thing to me as well. I still haven't quite adapted, despite attending three baby showers in the last there months and going through my own wedding shower. I participated in the latter as graciously as I could because I knew the organizers did it as a very kind gesture to me. I'm also happy to do the baby showers for women that I befriend, although I much prefer when they have both women and men as guests. I'm not super keen on the games and things like that, but I love socializing, and, in my book, every excuse is good to celebrate.

Two of the baby showers were reasonable affairs. A bit of eating, a bit of drinking (I had a beer with the father!) and a few nice gifts. One of them was so over-the-top it made me really uneasy. There were about 40 women there and everyone gave pretty big gifts. All that consumption and wrapping paper etc. bothered me a little. On the other hand, I know that the women there were celebrating, in their own way, the arrival of a new member of the community. (It was great that it was after the baby was born, so the cutie was passed around and met a lot of people, too.)

When invited, I try to partake as a "participant observer." I do ethnography for a living, after all. When my partner and I have children, I know there will most likely be a shower organized. So be it. I'll be thankful, and not worry too much if things are not going my way for once.

I totally agree that you should not feel like you have to participate if you're not interested and/or don't know this person too well. But I also understand that you would feel a bit funny about if you didn't. If it was me, I think I would bring just a small gift (it's still possible to find something decent for $10) and attend the event just to get a taste of English Canadian West Coast culture.

[Biciclista]

The other day I'm in line at Superstore, a big, Costco-inspired grocery store - I go there about three times a year! - and the two women ahead of me are checking out with 40 to 50 assorted 2L bottles of pop... and a 4L container of vinegar. I though it was funny so I asked what they were going to do with that, she said: "Oh, we're having a baby shower for my daughter." She proceeded to explain there would be 200 guests. I still can't wrap my head around that.

**.

WOW, just wow!