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  1. #31
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    3,151

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    What they said!

    Another idea: Get him to ride a 50 pound bicycle with fat tires. It's a great equalizer

    But don't be embarrassed about being nervous.

    I am reasonably sure I don't have the responses to ride fearlessly, though they're better than they were. I do a great "deer in the headlights" thing when I'm overwhelmed, which means I'd crash. Even if I'm wrong, that is MY choice of the risks I choose to take. So, even though after oh, a dozen years (and the luck of big thighs) I've gotten strong enough to seriously embarrass people on indoor time trials, I don't ride on the streets with the people I can out-do on a trainer. Those rides freak me out.

    Get stronger and faster on *your* terms.

  2. #32
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by BleeckerSt_Girl View Post
    Trinena,
    Yes to everyone else's comments, and i will say you are doing WAY better than I did when i started 2 1/2 years ago!

    but I'll add one more thing...
    Please, whatever you do, don't let other people's impatience cause you to ride faster than you safely can. You do NOT want to be rushing through tricky intersections and narrow areas or speeding down hills just so you don't fall further behind anyone you are riding with. Never ride faster than you feel confident and in control.

    Please do NOT compromise your safety in order to please others. TAKE YOUR OWN SWEET TIME when maneuvering through traffic and intersections. Remember you are not a seasoned rider and you will need that extra second or two of safety margin if you find yourself in a dangerous situation.
    Your life is worth way more than trying to keep up with other people. You may have to tell them that, too.
    So glad you affirmed my gut instinct BleeckerSt_Girl. I stood/stand my ground about intersections & going through traffic. I told my honey either he could slow down and wait for me or wait for me later on because I won't risk it. I'll do the same with others. My DH said treat yourself like a pedestrian (when on bike) - well, if i were a pedestrian I would stop and look at the car drivers to make sure they saw me before I went. And I won't run stale yellow lights! Don't worry everyone - I'm a strong-headed woman (taurus/ox). I'll be putting on my screaming yellow Brooks jersey (good sale & rec'd here on this forum)that I just got in the mail.

  3. #33
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by Momonbikemob View Post
    Phew! It is so nice to hear all your comments about being nervous to ride out on the road at first! I ride on the trainer mostly because I want to ride and can only manage to get on the bike during my almost two-year-olds nap (she won't sleep in the trailer) and while my 5 year-old is in Kindergarten. On weekends my DH is baffled why I don't go out on the road. I always prefer the trainer because we live on a hill and I feel safer. I am simply chicken to ride on the road and am not proud to admit it, but that's the truth. I also don't feel comfortable with my mechanical skills enough to ride alone yet if something happened to the bike. I have only been out on the road by myself once in the last two years. I thought I was alone with my fears...
    Anyway, Its great to hear the encouragement for Trinena and I wish you all the best getting out there with other riders willing to go your pace!
    I am going to try to get out on the road more in the spring - after I get in better shape and after I find some other women my speed to ride with... my DH likes to go faster than I am able too. So I understand and sympathize and am encouraged by all that has been posted so far! Thanks!


    momonbikemob.blogspot.com
    Keep us posted on your progress Momonbikemob esp. with that hill. I use a trainer at home as well but being outside w/ beautiful scenery is a good motivator. You're def. not alone!

  4. #34
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by cobalt View Post
    I am new too but I am fearless which is worse! I don't like to stop and I give my husband fits on rides. He says that once I have crashed I will be more careful...

    He "mothers" me on rides and I don't like that.

    I go your speed, wish we didn't live so far apart. Wouldn't it be nice to have a friend close by that you could ride with?

    I do go by myself but it's getting darker earlier and it will be too cold soon and then it will snow. That will end that!

    Just go for a spin around your neighborhood, a few miles, no need to always go long.
    ya if you lived closer maybe we'd find that happy medium btwn fearful & fearless! and if only there wasn't such a steep hill around my block! hills all over the place here but shorter rides are a good idea.

  5. #35
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by gingerale View Post
    DH doesn't ride bikes so when I do ride with someone, it's usually my dad. LOL! Of course, it's a little embarressing because my dad is 67 yoa and is amazing on a bike. The man can climb hills like he's in his 20's! Not me. I'm a hill slug through and through! LOL But he enjoys when we ride together so he refuses to go ahead of me, even though he's stronger. He'll go as slow as I need to go, which I admit does sometime get a little annoying. I do push a little harder when he's with me because I don't want him to have to go too slow. But all in all, we enjoy our time together when we can ride. And even though I know how to change a flat, he's awful handy to have around when I have a tire go down! LOL

    I did agree, for the first time the other day, to ride with him on a long stretch of a semi-major roadway. We didn't see a ton of cars, but it was enough for me. There's a difference riding in the state park where I ride and a car pass me at 30 mph versus one passing me at 65-70 mph! I have never been so happy to finish a ride in all my life!! Won't be doing that again anytime soon, I don't think. My dad is way too much of a daredevil for me.
    How awesome Gingerale to have your dad to ride with! Come to think of it my fret fret dad was always coming up with the most dramatic scenarios/chain of events of how i could get hurt doing such and such yet he cheered me on playing rough in soccer. go figure!

  6. #36
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by channlluv View Post
    I'm with you. My favorite route is around (and around and around) the five-mile paved path that rings a reservoir near my house. I did 25 miles there today. Almost no car traffic at all, and those that were present are limited to 15mph.

    There were a lot of kids on bikes there today, and I'm pretty sure their parents bring them there for the same reason I'm there. It just feels so much safer.

    Of course, that said, I've wrecked there twice (once when my daughter crossed in front of me and I slammed on my breaks and flipped my bike, and the other when was strapped in - damn straps - and, yes, tried to get off the bike. I was going zero mph and approaching my own car, slipped one foot out to lean toward the ground, and leaned the other way...Roxy fall down go boom), and one of my daughter's little friends went over a rocky 12-foot embankment into some bushes when a pedestrian didn't yield the middle of the path and the girl couldn't safely pass her on the left (a blader was coming), so she had nowhere to go but over the edge to the right. So, really, it's only sort of safe. But, man, that 25 miles felt good today.

    My knees tonight are feelin' it, but the whole time I was riding today, I was singing to myself, "I am powerful, and my body feels great. I am powerful, and my body feels great." And then I'd go into my "135" cheer, over and over again, like a rap song, "One-thirty-fiiiiiive, one-thirty-five, one-thirty-fi-i-i-i-ive, one-thirty-five." A friend loaned me her copy of The Secret on CD and the weight segment advocates focusing your attention on your ideal weight rather than losing weight. It is supposed to help re-program the brain to get my body to my ideal weight. My actions have to support my thoughts, though, so 25 miles is my new workout goal.



    I'm not sure I could do it in traffic, though.

    Roxy
    love your mantra Roxy. I talk to myself & it helps. I also think of K.West's song "stronger." funny, i actually ordered the Secret from netflix but it's way backordered.

  7. #37
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by GraysonKelly View Post
    Hey there,
    Wow! Do I understand where you're coming from. I have only been doing this for about 5 months now but up until last week I was doing it all on a Mountain Bike (who by the way looks exactly like your bike except of course that she's a mountain bike). Anyway, I always ride along because my partner doesn't ride. I am naturally cautious about where I ride and how I ride, but on the new bike it's almost like learning all over again. I can't imagine trying to keep up with others right now until I get comfy. Patience, patience, patience....number one rule. At least for me. You'll get it and probably blow him away a time or two. Good luck and don't quit, you're doing great!
    Gray
    hee, hee - now i have this fantasy of blowing him away on a climb (he hates climbing). course the triple crank on my bike is an advantage.

  8. #38
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88

    Talking

    Quote Originally Posted by Geonz View Post
    What they said!

    Another idea: Get him to ride a 50 pound bicycle with fat tires. It's a great equalizer

    But don't be embarrassed about being nervous.

    I am reasonably sure I don't have the responses to ride fearlessly, though they're better than they were. I do a great "deer in the headlights" thing when I'm overwhelmed, which means I'd crash. Even if I'm wrong, that is MY choice of the risks I choose to take. So, even though after oh, a dozen years (and the luck of big thighs) I've gotten strong enough to seriously embarrass people on indoor time trials, I don't ride on the streets with the people I can out-do on a trainer. Those rides freak me out.

    Get stronger and faster on *your* terms.
    - Absolutely!

    DH said I have the advantage of weighing 60 lbs less than him. Not sure how that works until i get stronger/more fit. His bikes weigh around 16 lbs. However it would great if he were to get a bike trailer for our 96lb dog! Found a couple big ones but too pricey.

    http://petstroller.blogspot.com/2006...ailer-now.html
    http://www.bicycletrailers.com/Doggy...ke-trailer.pro

  9. #39
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Sacramento, CA
    Posts
    747
    That plan didn't work for me. For the first three rides when my husband pulled the trailer, I could keep up. But he still has a lot more time to train than I do, so within a couple of weeks he was pulling the trailer and completely leaving me in the dust, which was demoralizing to say the least.

    So now I pull the trailer and tell him to enjoy his ride and we usually get home at the same time.

  10. #40
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    California
    Posts
    95
    I live in San Ramon - sounds like we are pretty close in distance. I have trained new cyclists for years. I led a no drop ride for women only for about 10 years and we met once a month on a Saturday morning. I also sponsored a clinic for couples showing how to equalize riding abilities and enjoy riding together. I only work on Thursdays and Fridays and would be glad to ride with you on a Mon, Tues or Wed. I am an ex-racer and ride with a group of women - about 10 of us - every Saturday. My kids are in school too - 5th and 7th grades. We could go out for short rides. I tell all riders, not just new ones riding with their husbands, cross streets and stop at lights for your own safety. don't try to keep up with faster riders. Safety is your first concern. Bekki
    I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy it.

  11. #41
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88
    Quote Originally Posted by vinbek View Post
    I live in San Ramon - sounds like we are pretty close in distance. I have trained new cyclists for years. I led a no drop ride for women only for about 10 years and we met once a month on a Saturday morning. I also sponsored a clinic for couples showing how to equalize riding abilities and enjoy riding together. I only work on Thursdays and Fridays and would be glad to ride with you on a Mon, Tues or Wed. I am an ex-racer and ride with a group of women - about 10 of us - every Saturday. My kids are in school too - 5th and 7th grades. We could go out for short rides. I tell all riders, not just new ones riding with their husbands, cross streets and stop at lights for your own safety. don't try to keep up with faster riders. Safety is your first concern. Bekki
    Hi Vinbek - Thank you for your offer! I think San Ramon is about a half hour from Oakland? I'll pm you this wknd for more details. That clinic for couples was such a great idea. You must have witnessed some interesting dynamics.

  12. #42
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NorCal
    Posts
    88

    update: had fun today!

    i went out with the DH again and I was very clear to him about going slow & stopping & all that. He showed me the back way to the park that I'd like to ride around for practice on my own. I had to repeat "relax" to myself on a busy intersection. This time we were on our cross bikes and we rode on the grass - a good workout! so call me crazy but I wanted him to show me how to dismount. He broke it down in a few steps (he's relatively new to cross but racing) and I got so far as to unclipping the right foot, coasting, pulling it up over the saddle, leaning to steady the bike and then back into being clipped. It was fun but of course no cars to deal with on the grass. Call me crazier but I'm actually thinking of going to a free beg. cross clinic. Which reminds me I should give my DH props for being a good & patient teacher today. Thanks again to EVERYONE who has replied & shared. Your responses have been incredibly encouraging & helpful to me. DH just informed he might have scored me lighter tires for my cross bike. so sweet!

 

 

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