yeah, I missed the part about having to ask for money.
Depending on his unit, he may have early morning physical training, which is mandatory in some units- so he may not have a choice about the early morning workout. That is done prior to the regular workday. And the days in the military are never really regular anyway, so he doesn't have much choice in that area either.
However, you may need to take some of your paycheck and put it in your own account for things you want- that's why you work. Your paycheck alone shouldn't go to the household and children's expenses- if it's less than his it should just supplement. An equivalent part of his paycheck needs to go for that stuff. He aint the boss of you.
It's not much of a workout, but you might be able to ride on a bike path with the 8 year old on her own bike and you pull a trailer with the younger one, and you can all go out together. I've also seen people who have one child on a trail-a-bike which is pulling a trailer for the baby.
Hope you can find a bit of time for yourself- maybe the spin classes would be great for the winter- sometimes the gyms have childcare.
vickie