lease question

[Mr. Bloom]

What about just providing written notification revoking the guaranty? It may not be specifically addressed in the lease, but if you do that, it may nudge the landlord to get a new lease signed...

[li10up]

Thanks for the help everyone. She is on a month-to-month lease right now. I've asked her to sign a new lease but she hasn't done so and I don't think she wants to commit for another year. They've had a few set-backs financially and I've already had to help them out several times. I had to tell her that they are now on their own after this last bailout. I do worry about her but I can't continue to be her safety net and I hate the thought of being in debt to anyone. I thought about writing a letter to the landlord and sending it certified mail but didn't know if that would be binding. Plus, I don't want to force my sister into signing another lease for a year. I guess I'm just stuck.

[ilima]

Don't let your sister take you down with her. Get off the lease ASAP. If she doesn't pay the rent, you're stuck holding the bag. If you go down with her, you will probably end up in a position where you are unable to offer assistance at all.

There are rumors of credit-card lockdowns. You don't want to risk your financial independence.

[Tuckervill]

I'm with Ilima! Do what you can to get off the lease. If she's not going to recommit for a year, that mean she's going to have to move. Some places will make you move if you don't sign a lease after a few months (depending on whether they have people waiting to move in, I guess). They'd rather have someone on a 12 monther than a month-to-month.

Your sister is not treating you right, especially since you've been lending her money. So what if she feels the pressure of signing another lease? She can move and get you out of the bind, or she can stay where she is for another 12 months. She already sees you as a soft-touch; don't be so easy on her anymore.

Karen

[vinbek]

I agree with Karen. We all love our families and we hate to see anyone in a bind, but I sense a trend here. Helping out here and there is ok, but sounds like you are bailing Sis out when she needs it. She might need a dose of "tough love". You will be doing her a favor to let her stand on her own two feet. I would talk with her about what you are willing to do in this situation - set some boundaries - and then do it. It will never feel comfortable - good luck to you.

[Aggie_Ama]

I am not judging you but I agree with the tough love advice. My husband and I agreed never to lend money to our brothers. Neither have very good heads for money, sadly. The only time I have my brother was so down and out he couldn't buy toilet paper. Even then I told him I couldn't help but I did give the money to my mother to give to him, I just didn't want him to think I had those type of resources since it was a large sum. He paid her back every cent which she gave to me without him knowing. He has landed back in binds again but never called me. It killed me to hear he pawned something that meant a lot to him but I felt I did the right thing. If I had the door open to lending money he would have that item but not the lesson. Good luck it is always so delicate with family!

[Tuckervill]

I heard my son was too broke to buy toilet paper, and I was happy to hear that he started going to the Exxon up the street to use the bathroom instead!

At least he wasn't stealing or begging for money. He and his girlfriend came through their brain-mush period and have good jobs, two new (PAID FOR) cars, and a house and he'll be 24 this November.

Karen