Lost a mechanic (long post)

[Bluetree]

Fuji...

PM me the name of the store and the mechanic. I know some LBS owners/managers in the area and may be able to help.

No one should have to deal with that (with ANY kind of business) and the owner/manager should know about it.

EDIT: BTW, if that had happened to me I wouldn't avoid him or the shop. I'd give that guy (and the LBS) a piece of my mind and it would be loud enough so everyone within a 10-block radius would hear about it. Not only would I make it clear how intolerable that behavior is, I would make sure every female rider in every single Los Angeles cycling/triathlon club knew about it. Then I would then threaten to organize a boycott of the store if I didn't get a suitable response from ownership.

But that's just me.

[Irulan]

Fuji...


EDIT: BTW, if that had happened to me I wouldn't avoid him or the shop. I'd give that guy (and the LBS) a piece of my mind and it would be loud enough so everyone within a 10-block radius would hear about it. Not only would I make it clear how intolerable that behavior is, I would make sure every female rider in every single Los Angeles cycling/triathlon club knew about it. Then I would then threaten to organize a boycott of the store if I didn't get a suitable response from ownership.

But that's just me.

With or without your bf ?<gdr....>
Best answer yet.

[Bluetree]

I have a "no tolerance" personal policy when it comes to behavior like this. I don't make excuses for a guy's bad behavior ("poor guy, he musta had a bad day") nor do I think anyone needs to "prove" their worthiness or their word by bringing back-up. That mechanic screwed up, royally, and you are not the one who should pay for his actions by being inconvenienced or made to feel bad.

Embrace your power, girl, both as a person and as a paying customer.

[kfergos]

I'm inclined to agree with Bluetree, although in all honesty I don't know how I'd deal with that if it happened to me. Certainly I'd go to the manager, and I think the suggestion of a written complaint is good just for the record.

Anyhow, I'm sorry you got stuck in this nasty position, and I hope you can find a good new LBS & mechanic in the future.

[Irulan]

It might be a good opportunity to learn to work on your own bikes.

[Pax]

I have a "no tolerance" personal policy when it comes to behavior like this. I don't make excuses for a guy's bad behavior ("poor guy, he musta had a bad day") nor do I think anyone needs to "prove" their worthiness or their word by bringing back-up. That mechanic screwed up, royally, and you are not the one who should pay for his actions by being inconvenienced or made to feel bad.

Embrace your power, girl, both as a person and as a paying customer.

Right ON sister!

[vinbek]

If I were the owner or manager of this shop, I would want to know if I had jerks for employees. I wouldn't want someone running my customers off.
I would talk with the owner of the shop and let him know what happened and how you don't want to use his shop anymore. It can only be a win-win.
They either talk to this guy and get his behavior corrected or fire him for harrassment. I feel sorry for the wife....I wouldn't be embarrassed. I would be angry.

[Adventure Girl]

Here's my 2 cents....

The way I see it, the guy did two things wrong.
1. Took your bike to your car when you told him not to.
2. Gross violation of your personal space.

Problem #1:

The stupid mechanic would not let me take my own bike to my car, he just had to hold on to it and felt the need to help me. I already felt uncomfortable and told him to give me my bike. He just walked out of the store with it! So I open my car from a distance and watch him put my bike in the back.

You told him to give you your bike, but he still took it. I can understand why this would make you angry. I prefer to load my bikes by myself, and when people offer to help, I say, "no thanks". But if they persist, that polite "no thanks" turns into a very strong "NO THANKS". Then if they still don't get the picture, I say "NO!!"

By telling him to give you your bike back, but then opening your car so he could put it in the back, you weren't really being clear with him that "no means no".

Problem #2:
There's no excuse the hug. And it seems very clear that you were quite firm in declining his advances. I agree that you should speak with the owner/manager. Remember that the mananger didn't do anything wrong and you aren't angry with him, but be sure he knows that this guy was way out of line!

And in the future, just be sure that you really mean it when when you say, "No"! It's not only the word "no", but it's your tone and actions that are important.

[TahoeDirtGirl]

Fuji, please do something about it.

I had something similar happen when I went car shopping in Feb. I knew something was up when the sales guy I talked to said I sounded beautiful on the phone. I should of just went somewhere else. Duh.

But no, I wanted this jeep so bad, I went to the dealership at night (strike one) and went on a test drive alone with him (strike two) where he grabbed me and tried to kiss me (strike three). I promptly spun the jeep out and went back to the dealership. It could have been worse. I just wanted out of there. Yes, I was embarrassed, I have no idea why but that quickly turned to anger. Here I was, all alone on the east coast, this guy has my address, knows where I live, knows everything because I filled out my info before test driving. So I left.

The next evening, I came back. I did bring a male with me and had him stand off to the side. Little did anyone know, it was my bike mechanic. I went to the salesmanager and told him what happened. I wanted the sales guy to know that I wasn't alone. He wasn't a part of conversation, he was just there. He didn't hear any of the conversation, just outside displayed nicely in the big plate glass.

The guy got fired. End of story. They were very apologetic in fact, very surprisingly apologetic. Which makes me think this wasn't his first complaint.

The reason I went back? All night I kept thinking, what if he did that to another woman and didn't take no for an answer...what if she was me but 20 years old? I have to tell you ladies, in my 20s I was not this bold. I learned by being tested, and I just kept thinking, if that happened to someone's daughter or sister, I would by very mad.

The reason I brought the bike mechanic? I wasn't scared, but I wanted to make sure if this guy was a wingnut that I did have someone in my corner if something happened to me. I didn't want to be followed, or harassed.

So Fuji, do what you think is right, but just make sure you do it how your gut tells you. BF in the car, right next to you, whatever...listen to that instinct that we were given and use it...sometimes we all need a little help and there is no shame in that. I would say that having him next to me would be unnerving for me...

[withm]

Actually it was way more than an "invasion of personal space." If the guy so much as touched her it could easily be construed as "offensive touching" if not downright assault. You have to follow up on this one.

[Skierchickie]

How creepy! And scary. An infuriating. I wouldn't want to go back there, either. His boss needs to know, though. Your instincts were definitely right about this guy - good job keeping yourself safe.

I don't know what the "right" response is, or whether the BF should be with you. Moral support is a wonderful thing, though. Maybe he could go with you, but wait in the car while you talk to the manager? He doesn't have to be involved - just there to give you "attagirls" when it's over. Personally, I don't deal well with confrontation, and would be wanting it all to go away. But would that help you? Or his next target? Or his employer? Talking to the manager doesn't require confrontation, anyway.

Innocent puppy, or sinister stalker - either way he needs a severe reprimand - don't feel sorry for him. His poor family, yes.

No does mean no - whatever your tone of voice.

Tahoe - wow! How horrible!

[Irulan]

THD, did they make you a good deal on the jeep? They should have.

[Fujichants]

Thank you for all the advice. I am going by the store tomorrow to speak with the manager. I know the mechanic will be at Interbike so I am happy I don't have to run into him when I go into the store.

And yes...I need to start learning to take care of my own bike! I am just so afraid i'll end up breaking something

[Velobambina]

Actually it was way more than an "invasion of personal space." If the guy so much as touched her it could easily be construed as "offensive touching" if not downright assault. You have to follow up on this one.

Agree wholeheartedly. You said no and he ignored you. There's something wrong w/this man.

I'm sorry this happened to you. Don't blame yourself. Do what makes you feel comfortable (boyfriend coming w/you or not---that's your decision and I'm confident that we all support you whatever you decide). I think it takes much courage to report this jerk. I've been there, as have many of us, I suspect. I figure that if he did it to you, he probably will do/has done it to someone else.

Sending lots of good karma your way.

[TahoeDirtGirl]

THD, did they make you a good deal on the jeep? They should have.

You know Irulan, the universe works her mysterious magic.

I just wanted out of that place as soon as possible. I was so turned off by it I just cooled my heels and did my searching online for the perfect jeep.

I was going to go back but found out...a month after all of this, they had..CLOSED! So that to me was a big sign.

I bought it in RI and got a killer deal. Now if I could just get the stupid nav and radio to work right. I'm on my third system!

Sorry to hijack, thinking of ya Fuji!